Coming to a close.

I can't believe this - in a few hours, we will be performing our last play. The final show of an incredible run for Sex and La cité.

I am so afraid that I will be a blubbering mess tomorrow because:
- it was such an amazing experience, so complelty incredible, so educational, so wonderful.
- I haveconsideredd these people as part of my family, well, my extended family as the little one I have here is getting smaller (with only my mother and Grandmother still around) so the cast has become my surrogate family. For 6 months we have hung out together, shared our dreams, ourvulnerabilitiess andstrengthss - we have been so close, in such an intense period of time; it's going to be like cutting off a limb when we go our own ways. And it's sadbecausee I think we were all starting to develop stronger bonds as each show finished.
- I will just miss all the fun and intensity we had as a group, seeing the genesis of this project, seeing all these beautiful souls mature into their roles, how each one took on something of themselves and made each character their own. Let me tell you, this sure beats a 9 to 5 job!!
- I will have to find something else to do with my time and energy and if I don't soon, I am going to crash and burn quickly.

And that scares the shit out of me.

Cause when I work intensely, and then it comes to a screeching halt, it's hard to get back to a 'normal life'. This group, theserehearsalss, these late night pow wow sessions with Samantha and Charlotte, my little heart to hearts with Miranda, Spiro, Steve and the others - that bonding, that sharing will be not as intensee as it once was as we go about our own separatee lives. I have shared so many things with these people - I have shown them sides of myself that most people never see - I showed them becausee I felt comfortable, and in trying to be a good actor, you have to sometimes make yourself vulnerable. I am not weakenedd by the experience - on the contrary, I feel stronger by having shared and opened myself up and been confident about who I am and what I do (I also know that actors are generally a neurotic bunch of people so I fit in well) and not be judged by them.

I realized alot of things from working on this project -
1) I have to follow my dreams - no matter what happens. I think I have a talen tt and I want to share my gift and bring happiness to others. It makes me so happy to know that this play will be the start of many careers - even if mine does not take off, I really don't care. Just knowing that I was able to help someone realize their dreams makes it all the worth while.
2) I love working and being with artsy people - I can hang out with computer geeks and morph with the best of them, but when it comes down to me spending quality time with people - these are the kind of people that keep me alive and happy.
3) Discipline - both in acting and writing. I finished this play, I acted in it and studied my part. it was so inspirational to see my fellow actors do the same. Wow.
4) To always follow my instinctss. This whole project was done on the basis of my instincts - and I also applied that to my personal life as well. Sure there have been ups and downs but with every day, I learned something about others as well as my self. And that alone is priceless.
5) the value of friendships and faith - those two words say it all.

I could go on, but it's almost 2:15 and I need sleep. I have a huge day tomorroww and then on Monday an appointment with the CBT clinic and then taking pictures at a corporate function in the afternoon. Urgh. I will not be looking pretty Monday morning.

But Friday's show was another sell out! It took a while for the crowd to warm up, but once they did, they were really howling! And we were all on our marks - every single one of us sharp and shining.

Sigh.

This still seems like a dream.

And tomorrow is going to be so sad, but it doesn't have to be.
This could be the start of something big.

And I have a funny feeling it will be, cause my crystal ball says so...
;-)

Talk of the town!

So the play is a roaring hit! Last night was wonderful! The energy was high and we played to a sold out - standing room only crowd. There was one point where Samantha attacks the guy (Gino) that she picks up at a bar and leans him against a table, but this time, the table broke!! Nobody was hurt, but it made for an interesting ad lib! We all went with the flow - and I ran on stage yelling: "Oh Dio Mio! Gino what are you doing?!! And what have you done to my table?!?!"

The rush is still rushing in my head and I can't believe that after Sunday, the gang that I spent 6 months of my life with will be over. Well, not 'over' but there will not be the project that linked us all together. I guess that means I have to write another play then!!

Here are some of the comments people have been leaving behind on the fringe website:

If these people can turn a Mae west orgy into a spectacle, then I am looking forward to what they can do with a spoof of a sequel!! I heard from a friend who heard from a friend who heard from someone who saw one of the rehearsals that it is gut busting pee in your pants funny!! Gotta see it!

"Charlotte, have a cup of 'shut the fuck up' " - and other one line zingers had me in stitches! Funniest thing since Cheese Whiz!! A MUST SEE!! They all look so much like their characters - quite uncanny! A must see for all fringers!!


Oh my god!!! SO SO SO SO SO funny!! The house was packed and everyone was howling w/ laughter. The cast even looks like the girls! Do not miss this show.!


Alright . . . this show isn\'t good. Stop with the good reviews! The whole show revolves around a gimmick . . . that the characters are played by drag queens. Which is funny for all of 120 seconds. There is nothing else creative or good about this piece. YES, they look VERY much like the TV characters . . . but should they get laurels for the show just because of that?! NO! Hmmm. The characters are played by drag queens?



It's smart - true to the TV show, not only do the girls look like the originals, they have the characters mastered. Throw in a hilarious supporting cast and a genuinely sharp script and it's a hoot. OK - maybe I didn't belly laugh all the way through (which isn't to say that I didn't at all - I did), but I did get that warm glow that Carrie Bradshaw and co weren\'t quite done...This is a fun. fun show!


Really funny!! I thoroughly enjoyed it - well written and well acted! In fact I will go back to hear the lines that I missed because the audience was laughing so much!!! Great show!!!


Not sure if the last reviewer saw the same show, or slept through the production! These girls (not drag queens!) play their characters so well I had to remind myself a couple of times that it wasn't Kim or Cynthia on stage playing Samantha and Miranda. Lots of laughs and well set in the Montreal context. If you enjoyed Sex in the City then this is a must see. Contrary to what is being said by the poster above, the cast is not made up of drag queens! (although there are some in the show).


Sex in la Cite isn't gimmicky; it's a funny and entertaining play. The cast totally has these characters nailed. They deserve extra kudos for that. If you want to be entertained - you can't go wrong.


Contrary to what is being said by the poster above, the cast is not made up of drag queens! (although there are some in the show). Sex in la Cite isn't gimmicky - it's a funny and entertaining play. The cast totally has these characters nailed. They deserve extra kudos for that. If you want to be entertained - you can't go wrong. PS - the venue has air conditioning AND sells beer! whoo-hoo!


"Abso*?!@inglutely" fantastic show... SALC has somehow managed to capture the spirit of SATC exquisitely - not an easy feat! Every bit of the sexiness, hilarity and charm of the girls\' adventures in New York was brought back to life in Mile End in with some very clever, uniquely Montrealais twists... The actresses portraying the four main characters simply NAILED their characters - body language, facial expressions, the real deal.. Not to mention the lines they were given; the script was freshly punny and yet true to the original style, over-the-top in just the right places - I wasn't the only audience member actually howling with laughter! Drag show at Chez Mado, Melissa Ethridge, Gino (sorry) dance routine at Thursdays... me, I loved this show, bro. You, bro, you go see it.


i am an avid watcher of sex and the city. I came to see this show with ALOT of expectations. I was not disapointed AT ALL! it was fantastic.. i loved the girls..(carrie good but abit whinny at times) samantha>she's awesome, really WOW! miranda and charlotte are funny as well. i LOVED the other performers, the singers were bang on!...thought the show reflected montreal and all it\'s personality and it's sexuality.... Therefore i recommend that all of you see this show and enjoy it for what it is> a really cool and well executed fringe show!!!


Wow!...WOw!!...WOW!!! Finally a show in the fringe that SCREAMS TALENT! Professionally handled...and those Drag Queens! WOWZA PASCAL! Not to mention those four gorgeous girls! WELCOME BACK LADIES!!!WE MISSED YOU!


I loved it! I wasn't expecting much, but boy, was I pleasantly surprised! The show was terrific - the cast has the characters down pat, and the writing is fantastic - funny, witty, fast-paced, and clever! Great show! Definitely a "DO NOT MISS" show!


Christine Ghawi carries the play very well, and Anne McMaster and Alexandra Valassis have the speech and gestures of Miranda and Samantha down pat. The play is wicked funny and really alot of fun.Peter Koussioulas is gonna be huuuge bro!


The main characters are bang on and loads of fun (and so are the supporting ones!!!). In fact, I'm sure the original staff in NYC would get some great laughs watching this as well!!! I had a few friends join me for the show and they all shared my opinion. Loved it! Now, go and enjoy it while you still can!!! Well, done everyone!!!


Painful, painful, painful... i\'ve watched plenty of sex and the city and this made me laugh very slightly once or twice. why is this show selling out?


Good show!!! Interesting twist on some characters ... P.S. Peter is a hunk ... I would have loved to be in Alexandra's position.

We think that the people who wrote the bad review (at least the first one) were not at the show because the drag queens don't appear until about 15 minutes into the play!

Well, you can't please everybody...

Playing to a sell out crowd!!

It's official! We have sold out all of our shows at the box office! The only tickets you can get are at the door - and you have to be there pretty early and there are a limited amount at that!

The show last night was a smash - late show 11:15pm and well, I sauntered in this morning at 4am, drunk as a skunk, laughing all the way home!! What a scream.
I am having so much fun!

And people love the show!
They loved all the actors who did a kick ass job!!!!
And they LOVE the script!!
I am so happy that I took the leap of faith and took the chance to do something that I have never done before...

So two more shows (not including tonight). I have a feeling that tonight's show is going to be special for some strange reason...

Apparently, David Duchovny and David Letterman are in town for the Grand Prix.
would that not be a hoot if one of them or another celeb came to see my little play!?!?
LOL

More details tomorrow ;-)

The Premiere!!

Well folks!
This was the night!!

The Premiere!!
AND IT KICKED ASS!!!!


AHHHH!!!!!!
It's 3:20am and I am a little tipsy and way happy but had to check in to say that the play was a SMASH SUCCESS!

I cant' tell you how exciting it was to hear the people laugh at all my jokes, even the stupid ones we as a cast had heard so many times before! It was such a rush to see all the actors hit their marks, have fun with the lines, laugh and interact with the audience. I can't tell you the kind of high it was to hear and see the people applauding when we came out for our bow.

I am flying...
And it's a beautiful view up here!!

And after the show, I can't tell you how many people came up to me and congratulated me on such a phenomenal play, wonderful writing, and my role as the irate Greek and Italian mother.

They actually laughed and clapped when I walked off stage!! Twice!!

I was floored.
Completely!

I could not believe it!

And for the first show, there were only really minor flub ups!

But the whole cast was shining, and we were all happy, and the energy was grand, and the magic was in the air, and at that moment, I knew that this was exactly where I wanted to be - center stage, with my fellow actors, in front of a receptive audience, loving my words, wanting to hear more, wanting to laugh and be a part of this magic called theater.

OH GOD!!

I am on such a high, but at the same time, I am a little numb. It feels like this was all a dream. But the wildest part is that starting Monday, we have 3 back to back nights!! And apparently we are already the buzz of the festival!!!

I am flying.

And I can't believe it.

I never n a million years thought I 'd get my feet off the ground.

But I have, and I see the horizon, and the skies are clear, and is the dawn of a new day ;-))))

Night Stalker

This is one of the photos I took of my friend Alex's body paintng - it was an impromptu shoot - she was completly naked except for a little g-string. The detail in the painting is incredible. The photo is pretty neat if I do say so myself ;-)

A quick pop in while I can!

Hello my dears!
I just wanted to pop in to let you know what has been going on!
CHAOS!!

We are having our first show on SATURDAY!! YEP!! THAT'S IT!

SATURDAY the 11th at 7:30pm!

I am soo nervous!! I have been loosing sleep over this - I have this fear that I will go on stage and freeze when I hear the people laughing. Imagine that - me standing on the stage, with curlers in my hair, a god awful nightgown, silly slippers and looking like an angry Greek/Italian mother!! It will be a sight to behold that is for sure!!

We have been rehearsing since last week and this week we are stepping up the pace - every night until showtime. We are doing full dress rehearsals - which means that we have to do our scenes and change in and out of costume in the allotted time (60 minutes). It's pretty chaotic. 12 People running around, looking for the right props and clothes - and we are rehearsing in somebody's apartment - not even on stage yet and we are still all over the map, but I have the uttmost faith that everybody will shine - Big will be the best big, Carrie will be as charming and quirky as ever, Miranda and Steve will be lovingly neurotic (along with the Bride of Chuckie doll!!), Charlotte and Samantha will wow them with their wacky and wild personalitlies. Then we have Pascal - the drag queen extrodinare who kills me and puts me into stictches every time he does his fake french canadian accent (and those legs!! Better than mine! I am so jealous!), the wacky waitreess/Mellisa Ethridge/aspiring waitress/Carrie Bradshaw groupie (and talk about doing multiple roles! Hats off to her!) and the two mooks - Gino and Sprio (who also have multiple roles) - I stand in awe in front of these people. As a group - it's incredible the amount of chemestry and energy we have together! And on their own, they are some of the most amazing, tallented and beautiful people I have met in such a long time.

God. I hope that this never ends, that we will continue to work together, that this is not just a one shot deal/flash in the pan.

I hope not...

But I have faith - and today, I was reminded that "HPK - you wrote this! Has it hit you yet, as you sit here, listening to the lines that you wrote!?!" It was true - this is my baby. People will be laughing at my jokes! And so many jokes packed into one play! They are one after another! Pretty outrageous! I asked a friend to take photos during out last dress rehearsal at the venue - hopefully he will be there and the pix will turn out! As soon as I get them, I will post them!!

And the photo thing is going well! I was part of an exposition lately and it went really well. Didn't sell anything, but made some amazing contacts, met up with a good friend of mine who I had not seen in 14 years (he still kept my poems that I wrote him 14 yeas ago!! I was so touched!! he was like my brother - keeping me out of trouble and my shoulder to cry on when I needed it.) He wants me to work on a calendar he is making soon - and it's funny - all these people who are popping into my life lately - old friends that I have not seen in YEARS, new friends that I am making - how the play came together and how I am making contacts through that, it's pretty wild and exciting!

And, AND - this woman called me who saw my website and wanted to know if I wanted to do some product shots for her and her company. This might be a steady gig and I am really excited to start! WOW! My head is spinning - I must try to keep it on in one piece!

So on that note, I am posting a few photos from the impromptu shoot that I did Saturday (the unexpected job that just fell into my lap!) and talk about 6 degrees of separation - the girl in the photo knows the main character - the girl playing Carrie in my play!! WILD WILD WACKY SHIT!!

Here is her website - http://www.killerboots.ca
Very cool girl - and her name is the same as mine - but she spells hers with a C.
Strange coincidences!!

Whooooooooooooo ...

This is a recent photo from the play/rehersal. Here we see Miranda (left) with her leaky boob solution, and Charlotte (right) telling Carrie that she would never buy knock-offs. All the girls - as a the core group of four are so incredibly tallented, I feel so honoured to be in their company. We really lucked out to have found such an amazing cast - all of them! But then again, maybe it was no accident. All of this happens for a reason.

If this play manages to come together, it's going to be one hell of a funny play. I mean, really funny...

The director's chair.

This is from a fellow director friend of mine - his name is thedak and his website is here. His stuff is amazing - someone to watch for (he might kill me for doing this, but what the hell, we artsy fartsies have to stick together). I plan to link to some new tallent that I find on flickr to spread the message around - good art like this has to be seen...

As I listen to The Verve on my stereo, full blast - orchestrations rolling through my hallways, I take special notice to the lyrics as I pause to look out my window to the 1/2 clear 1/2 grey sky that floats by. It had just rained hard for a about 10 minutes and now the weather is having this great internal battle.

I'm a lucky man,

with fire in my hands...

I can imagine being up in a plane, high above the city, looking out of the window and see the Yin/Yang symbol in the clouds.

It's shitty outside, but I am not feeling shitty.

I am feeling quite strong and wise. I am thankful to be where I am now.

37 and loving it.

Never thought I'd hear those words fly out of my mouth (or out of my fingers!!)

Combination of new meds, 96 hours of fever, trying to change my perspective on life, some soul searching, being shaken up both good and bad - perhaps that all has to do with it, or maybe I've just reached that point.

it's just a change in me

something in my liberty

You know that point when you just wake up one morning and you have that feeling of - ah ha! Okay. Yea. I think I'm starting to get it now.

I hope its stays.

I met up with a flickr buddy - thedak on msn. He's also a photographer (and a really amazing one - go and check out his stuff!!) and waxed poetic about filmaking, him telling me about how he was trying to wrap his head around being 'the big chief director' of the show. How do you do it? You know, rally around the troops without coming off as an asshole or too bossy, or without feeling guilty about telling them what to do?

And in that moment, in that sentence it hit me - I am being asked for advice because I have experience. And not 2 or 3 year of experience, we're talking 10 plus in the motion picture industry alone. I felt so honored that someone was coming to me for insight, help, wisdom.

Yea, you have earned your wisdom, you've earned your wings.

I always knew that I was in the arts for a reason, and that eventually I would be able to share my experiences and make a difference in somebody's life. It is a really special feeling. Kinda warming and calming inside.

Peace and contentment.

So we blabbed a bit, then I sent him a long email with all my book suggestions (Directing for Film - Eric Sherman and Sculpting in Time - Andrei Tarkovsky. Those are an ABSOLUTE MUST for any director or person who is a big fan of cinema) and personal stories about how I cope when things are on my shoulders. I can remember when some (albeit few) master artists would take the time to explain things to me; there is something about life experience that changes the way you look back on things, your perspective on your own history changes - you are a little further away, can now see the forest for the trees and have gained insight that only comes with living a full life.

I feel like I am a happy antique leather couch - the ones that look really old and rugged, the ones with the huge arm rests with the gold rivets on the side. Worn in more places than some, but each spot is rich in texture and uniqueness.

Yea, uniqueness.

I look out my window to the little drops of rain that hang on. With help from the wind, some of them are disappearing, some are joining together to make larger ones.

Stillness.

And for now, it seems like the grey has won, but the light will come around again eventually

I'm not too worried anymore...

This is a picture I snuck from the shoot last week. On the left, production assistants, middle, the director (brilliant dude!) and the president of the production company who hired us to pull all this stuff off. I like to call this photo "At least I think she knows what she is doing" as he watches me set up a new scene. 

Sick but happy.

I am so sick.
I have had a fever of 104F and it has been going between that and 102 since Tuesday night. My whole body aches - it hurts to breathe, cough, sneeze, but I am one happy camper. Oh, a very happy camper.

Before I fall into this keyboard, I just wanted to let you all know that the shoot went incredibly well, better than I actually thought it would. I was blessed by being able to work with a photographer, and a lighting technician who has been in the industry for the past 25 years, so his knowledge helped me so much. At first I was sooo nervous, knowing that the 30 some odd people milling about behind me were watching me and the director 'do our stuff', but once I got into the groove, the day just smoothed by.

It was ironic and a blessing that I started to get a fever only after the last hour - I had already finished my shots and the day was pretty much done. I went home and collapsed into bed where I have been for the past 2 days.

I called the director, I was dying to know what the images looked like: They are amazing! It looks really good! This is going to look so fantastic when it's all put together!

Music to my ears and my fever riddled body.

I am supposed to do a mini performance with my troupe tonight. It's only two minutes, and I am hoping that I won't have to let the gang down, but just that - just knowing that I pulled off that shoot and the images look great make me a happy camper.

Sigh.

'Oh my God' - and so begins our summer...

Oh my God.
I am flipping. Exhausted, stunned and flipping.
Nervous as all hell, a little panicked but good.
The universe has strange ways of telling us things, and sometimes if we listen just a little bit, we can hear the messages in the wind, in the flapping of a birds wings, or feel it in a ray of sunshine.

I went to meet with the producers of this corporate video I am going to be doing the cinematography for. This is the big bucks, and I found out that there are two other people on this ladder of advertising/client step - there is the client, who hired an ad agency, who hired the production house, who hired my friend to direct, who hired me to shoot the damm thing. When I say I have alot riding on my shoulders, I'm not kidding. It is my job to make all this stuff look pretty. And that is a big job.

I am nervous as hell!
why?!
Because there will be people watching my every move, waiting for the final product, watching how efficient I am. If I fuck up. What will I do next!? Alot of eyes on little old me!

The man of the house was kinda oblivious to my panic and plight:well welcome to the real world!!
I was so pissed off. What the hell do you know about lighting a room the size of plane hangar!??!

Sure, I could try to do it, I could fake it cause I have never done it before, but do I want to fake with 40 000$ of somebody else's $$?

Expensive mistake to make if I do make a mistake.

I have been trying to employ methods of Cognitive behavioral therapy - change your way of thinking, change the way you feel. Its alot of work - to re-program your mind to think another way. And the mind does resist! And hard! I had to spend a good 10 minutes on the way to the meeting this morning to shut off that tape in my head.
You're gonna fuck up.
They are gonna see you are an amateur
they are gonna smell your fear a mile away...

I went in there confident, spoke with the first set of clients - the ad agency. They were 3 people (two men, one woman) about my age, maybe younger. That helped - no corporate stuffy faces/suits. The director did some sort of fancy power point presentation and everybody loved it. We are going to be doing a ' making of ' the making of. (if you can figure that out).

There is going to be a photographer who will be taking her shots. We will be there filming her photographing these people. Needless to say, I was relieved when I found out she was a woman, even more relieved when I found out how wonderful and sweet she was.

We talked about lighting and how our lights would balance eachother out - she lights for her stuff, and mine would compliment hers, just as her lights could compliment my scene.

How cool is that?!
Working with a fellow photographer!?
Amen.
and a woman!?
Amen and a hallelujah!
She was really nice and soft spoken!?
Double amen and a glory be to God!

So I sat and talked with these people, watched as they went through the minutes of the meeting, and I took my q to go and set up my equipment. People seemed really nice. I tipped my imaginary hat to my director friend and was off.

Saw the production assistant. She asked me what kind of equipment I wanted.
Its been so long since I have done a huge shoot, let alone orchestrate one on my own.
I tried not to sound amateurish, but I was paranoid that it was as blatantly obvious as a hole in the head.
She seemed perplexed with my choices -that's it?! Those are all the lights you want?!

Ah, er, yea...

Big fucken oops.
I was sure she saw right through me like a pane of glass, AMATEUR stamped on my forehead, my dunce cap covering the m in amateur.

it was too late to back pedal - I'll get the chief electro guy to call you. Who do you usually work with!?
Ah, er, ah...

She was relay perplexed and I saw the warning signs go off in her head.
I am done for, toast, my cover's been blown.
Hasta la vista kitty!

I went downtown, distraught and panicking . I met up with a good friend of mine. Her boyfriend has just broken up with her the night before: I love you, but it's just not working out.
This after a year and 1/2 together.
ouch.

You know kitty, I just have to know that I will survive. It is gonna be hard for a while, I will miss him, but life will go on. I have to move on and keep busy.
I stood there in awe. This woman, more than 10 years my junior, was more put together than I was .

You impress the hell out of me girl!

I told her about my panic and worry - why worry!? You know your stuff, you know people who can help you!? Just put it all together.
She was right.
And so I did, but not without a little help from the universe...

I got home and was waiting for the call, the production manager to call me and say: are you sure you can do this?!
But there was no call.
Except one call - the chief electrician.
Turns out he is a photographer too, and was once an aspiring cinematic, like I was.

We bonded immediately. We laughed together, and it was all good.

We're going to make some beautiful images together!

That was music to my ears.

I have to light a candle tomorrow - somebody up there wants me to succeed in this. I mean one photographer on this shoot was a coincidence (allowed me to piggy back off of her lighting setup) but an electro (they are called gaffers in cine language) who is also a frustrated cinematographer like I am!? What a coincidence, no - what a blessing.


I will be spending the weekend going over storyboards and lighting setups and will be shooting all day Tuesday. Wednesday I will be recuperating and trying to pinch myself out of the daze I will surely be in.

Wish me luck my dears. Many people's reputation and money is riding on my little shoulders!!!

Oh, and the play ? Coming along swimmingly!
More about that next post - with pictures!

Post for angel A

In my previous post - Saturday, May 07, 2005 - My life as a TV Sit-com... angel-A said...
Hi Kitty!"How big is Big Buks?$35,000The first time I heard my friend tell me, I thought he said 3500$.I almost had a hear attack when he corrected me."My dear, I believe that very soon $350,000 won't surprise you.Don't forget - only the sky is your limit!!! Only the sky!You have a great talent, you are a rare jewel, rely on God, He stores a wonderful plan for you, just be opened and listen to Him... carefully .salute!!!

Well, I spoke to the director today - all systems are still go, but he said something that really sparked my curiosity and got my ears perking.

Go in and ask for $1000 as your flat day rate. That way she can bargain you down to 800. Not such a stretch. But if you ask for 200$ she is gonna say : this girl doesn't value herself much, and hey, lets try 150$!

A man can go into this situation and walk in knowing nothing about camera, but will bullshit himself and his way through and get the money he asks for, but a woman, who knows twice as much as the guy does, will ask for less and sell herself short. HPK, don't sell yourself short like that! Listen, I'm gonna be your pimp from now on, cause you deserve so much better!

I was momentarily stunned. He was right! So very right!

I wont sell myself short anymore. Why should I?!

In life, in relationships, with myself.

Time to silence the doubting Thomas and inner critic in my head. Time to slip my bitch boots on and start walking!

When all systems are go...

There is something in the air lately.
I have said before that this summer will be the summer when my life is gonna change - for the better, or should I dare say - for the utter fantastic...

Its a vibe I have.
Felt it since January.
Now things are happening.
Slowly but surely.

The play is coming together amazingly well. There is already a huge buzz about it across the city. And we have yet to poster and prostitute the play en masse.

I am (still waiting but) on final confirmation for a director of photography job - big budget. Super huge client.
I spoke with three fellow cast members who are now booking me to work with them on their future film projects - Pascal and his screenplay, Big and his current feature film in pre -prod right now, and Samantha who wants me to shoot her feature film probably next year.

I met up with two young guys - one a writer, the other a set designer, who were looking for somebody to direct a trailer for their upcoming feature film. I think I made a great impression on them. And if they like me, I would be the director for the feature. It would be my first independent feature film as director to my name. I will find out more on Tuesday.

I just got back from seeing the Black Crowes. I missed them when they came to town 11 years ago. I was accosted by the security guard for taking photos. I was so pissed off that I almost took my super extendo zoom lens and shoved it down his no neck fat throat. But instead, I stood there and something washed over me - a feeling of unstoppable determination - i want to do this for a living - photography - live entertainment photography. I will call the offices of the organizers of the Jazz festival and hound them until they say yes to taking me on as a staff photographer for this year's festival.
I won't take no for an answer.
I know I am good.
And I will make them know that too.


This is going to be the summer my life changes.
Warp speed - my focus is getting more (well, focused) precise.
A friend of mine said that he is putting in advance booking to become one of my groupies.
You, out of everybody I know, is going to be the first one to become famous.

Really!?
You don't say...
Fingers, knees and toes crossed and a prayer to the big G upstairs as I start the engine to this, my car and highway to a new life...

Shots from Sex In La Cite

Steve and another cast member practice in front of a mirror (that's Steve's reflection in the mirror).

This is Samantha and her possé as they go over their dance number. 

My life as a TV Sit-com...

Every other day, something happens in my life and I have to shake my head and say I have to write this stuff down cause nobody will ever believe me, and in two days, I will forget all the details...

Well, today was one of those days...

I was found out that a friend of mine pulled out al the stops to have me as a cinematographer for this corporate video that he will be directing. It's a video for some chartered accounting association - the aim of this mini-clip is to get kids who are just out of high school to make accounting an appealing choice. I am wondering how my friend is going to make a convincing argument to back that claim up. He has his work cut out for him and so do I...

Allow me to explain -
This is the real deal - the big thing. This is a well known production company with alot of pull in the city, and the company that wants this thing is paying big bucks to make it happen.
How big is Big Buks?
$35,000
That's their budget.
The first time I heard my friend tell me, I thought he said 3500$.
I almost had a hear attack when he corrected me.

Well, you see, I have worked on productions that have bee, well, under the $5000 mark. Peanuts when you consider the scope of this clip that I am working on.
This is the real deal !

If this thing ends up looking like shit, I will be in deep trouble!
I have been running around my house, flipping because I am wondering if I can actually pull this thing off! I mean, the director with whom I have worked with before loves my work - I mean he had to pull some serious strings to get me (a non -union member) to work on this aparently unionized shoot. He obviously believes in me enough to have him take on this project with him (his reputation is riding on this as much as mine is) but I AM SHITTING BRICKS!! I AM SOO NERVOUS! I have never pulled off anything like this of this magnitude before! This is big bucks!! BIG BUCKS! I think the key is to go in, bluffing my way through the whole thing, just like I did when Samantha asked me if I would write the play for her: Oh yea, no problem! It'll be a cinch!

And then I ran home, running around in circles, pulling out my hair saying:I can't do this! I have never written a play IN MY LIFE BEFORE!!
But here we are, two weeks away from the press showing, one month away from the actual play, and something that I could have never even conjured up in my wildest dreams is becoming a reality.
Wacky shit.

I wonder what I will be saying after this video!?!?
Crying or laughing?
Stay tuned!

So rehearsals today - it's amazing to see this thing come together! I saw the dance numbers this afternoon - and they are coming along amazingly well! Apparently, this play is already the buzz of the city. One of the top theater producers here in the city has already heard of it, and is on the jury for nominating the best play of the festival. Our fingers and toes are crossed...

I went out with Samantha for drinks. It was a beautiful night and we walked and talked alot. She is so elated with the play, and told me how she just knew that it was going to be me who would be able to translate her vision into reality.
How did you know!?
I just knew. I saw you, heard what you had to say, liked your ideas, felt comfortable with you right away, and just went with my gut.
Just like that?
Just like that. And I am so happy I did!

We reminisced about the rocky road the play has taken since it's inception - the director fiasco, the Carrie Bradshaw # 1 no go, our desperation to find a director (when one was right under our nose -Charlotte), finding the Greek and Italian mothers (yours truly) and then finding the right actors to play the right parts.

It's all coming together - it's all falling into place.

I told Samantha - mark my words - this is going to be the summer that our lives will change.
She smiled and agreed. I think she feels the same vibe that I do. The ball is rolling - it's been a long time coming. And we are all ready for our cameo.

You know, when we were having our first reading, with all the characters, everybody was laughing so hard. They were all amazed at how well written this play was! Remember when you walked in!? They were all still stunned!
I remember! I was turning beet red because everybody kept on gushing .
Well HPK - it is a brilliant play!
Not bad for a first timer eh?!
Its phenomenal!

We sat and imagined what this summer was going to be like - the rush of the performance, opening night, the encores, the crowds laughing at the jokes. I will be in shock - hearing all these people laughing at my jokes!! Funny thing, when I hear the actors reciting their lines, I can remember when I wrote each joke! A little trigger - that multi-fuckable joke was written at 5am on a Friday. It was Friday because I saw the recycling bins outside...

I am so floored.
I am in a state of buffered shock. Not quite really feeling the impact and magnitude of what I have done/created, but at the same time, feeling like I am observing it from a safe place - an observation tower of sorts.

God - so much emotion in one night, one day. After an emotionally draining weekend, this day of good news and elation goes a long way in healing me.

Onwards and upwards.
The best is yet to come...

Welcome to my 'Private Path'. Hope you enjoy the view... 

This is one of my cats - Zoe. She is just loves the camera. Notice the Cindy Crawford spot near her mouth. I just had to share this pic. I was feeling really crappy today. I just needed to make this blog look happy. *meow* 

Sometimes, we all have to take chances. I guess I am in a point in my life that I should be taking more, life is too short...