Solaris

Solaris
Originally uploaded by hellophotokitty.

The night before New Year's Eve. Last night of 2005. What a hell of a year folks.


So as I sit here, watching the clock near 3am, I reflect a little, wax poetic a tad and realize that I have almost come full circle.

A year ago this week I was asked to write the play - sex and la cité. It was this month that I shook on a deal to make me director of a friend's feature film that I will be shooting in NYC. Sex and la cité - about the girls from NYC coming to Montreal, Sex and the City - 4 30something girls living in NYC - do you see the similarities? A year from now, will I be waxing poetic as I find myself writing for HBO, rubbing elbows with Sarah Jessica Parket and Darren Star (creaters/producers of S.A.T.C)? Who knows. I never thought I would be here writing this that's for sure!

I spoke with two of my best friends today - one, a wise sage, my bro. It was so enlightening, and so apropriate that we met today. I got to sort out some things that were on my mind, we watched gleefully as a tea bud opened before our eyes to create the most lovley tea that I have ever tasted, we laughed, and reflected. It was a spiritual inventory/cleansing and it felt good.

Tonight, I called a best friend, my galpal, and despite her own shit on a plate, she let me rant, weep, and ramble on about all my woes under the sun. She gave me a kick in the ass alright, but it was not with a combat boot, but with a slipper, and God love her for that. With her too, I realized alot of things, realized that sometimes letting go is the best thing to do - old worries, self-defeating ways, old ties that bind, dreams that no longer fit the new me anymore.

It was all a cleansing. All taking inventory and tossing out what didn't belong.

How ironic that today was recycling day on my street...

I got the word tonight that I will be working at the club for New Year's Eve. I had been waiting on that forever. They called at 11:30pm. The boss told me: You better be around at midnight so we can have some champaigne!!

You bet my dear, you bet!

Out with the old, in with the new.

Here's hoping that 2006 will be a better year, and that all the seeds I have sown will finally begin to take root and grow.

All the best to you out there, whoever you are.
xo

Almost a year ago to the day...

It's almost a year ago to the day that I started this blog. Recently, I have been running around between Montreal and New York city, trying to take care of my mother, trying to get my life back in order, trying to find my footing - and then woosh! Days turn into months and here I am, 12 months later, a full 180 degrees. Endings to old things, moving transitions and begining of new things. I wonder what 2006 will have in store for me...

This is what I wrote a year ago...

Last one for 2004.
I am back - but only for a short short blog.
Things have been up and down - been sick, lost my voice, found it again, and then lost it partially as of today. Looked under the bed, in the closet but it's nowhere to be found.

I am asking the universe for inspiration and strength for the new year.
I feel that I am on the cusp of something great. All I need is the energy and the focus to get through it all.

I am thankful for all the sunny days so far - they manage to get me through these winter months.

I took this photo last night at one of my gal pal's place. She is ripping up her bathroom of the downstairs apartment - it looks like hell - quite literally. We thought that something industrial would look cool. The idea behind this was ' a nice girl ends up in a bad place'. One night, you drink too much, black out for a little while, and then wake up to find yourself someplace where you know you should not be. I really think it works. The conditions were horrible (literally shit mixed with damp earth on the floor) - it was cold, damp and dark. I really had fun with her - we work really well together. She believes in my work and thinks this stuff is exhibition quality. I value her opinion highly - she is not one to give out compliments easily. These are dark dark photos. Funny - the eye sees before the mind does. On that note (oh - how depressing!!!) I wish all my readers a happy happy new year and may all your dreams come true in 2005!!!

Exhibition at Medianoche

Exhibition at Medianoche
Originally uploaded by eqqman.

Me and my boyfriends in NYC.

This is me little less than a week ago when I was in NYC for the closing expo of the Medianoche art gallery in Spanish Harlem. It was so wonderful to be back, see people I had met only two months ago and to meet new ones as well.

Flickr has changed my life is so many wonderful ways!!

Kitty and Newell

Kat and Robert
Originally uploaded by NYCArthur.

This was a shot of me and my friend Newell at the flickr closing party in NYC (yep - went there again!!) I had such a blast and can't wait to go back!

I shook on a deal to direct and shoot my friend's film this summer. Lots of stuff happening.

I thought about it - I could have had any opportunity anywhere else, but it happens to be New York City. I can't tell you how long I have dreamed of something like this to happen!!

Fingers crossed for the new year!!

Happy holidays to you all!!
xoox

So boldly...

So boldly...
Originally uploaded by hellophotokitty.

This was taken the last night I stayed in NYC. I went through a whole gammut of emotions in the span of a few sleepless hours. If you have ever seen Apocalypse Now - you will remember the scene where Martin Sheen has that meltdown in the hotel - well, mine didn't end up as bad. It was actually a doorway to positive discoveries, and I am changed woman because of it...

Exactly where I am at now...

I just received an email from a dear dear friend of mine - hundreds and hundreds of miles away, but we are so close together in the same boat, when he inhales from his cigarette, I exhale out the smoke...

HPK I'm exhausted. There's a golden road in front of me, and all I can do is struggle to escape the grasp of my family's insanity, and the bogey-men that were planted in my head by them. When your earliest lessons in life are to hate yourself, and to distrust everyone else, finding your potential gets to feeling lost a lost battle.


My dear Rev. K - I hear you, so very well, but we have to try because we really have nothing left to lose.