This dream, it started off weird. I was in the ocean - my mom was warning me about going out too far - that I would surely drown, but i went farther anyway.
The sea was turquoise. Tropical blue. Cuba blue I call it. I was so buoyant, the buoyancy became almost a meditative state. I floated past a hanging tomato plant (saw one on tv the night before...) in the middle of nowhere. The vines were filled with these beautiful succulent tomatoes. Next to it floated a man - who told me I could eat one. (garden of eden perhaps??) and i did. It was not as sweet as I had hoped, but more meaty. He said something that I wish I could have remembered because it seemed to be some sort of life lesson thingy, but he did give me a blessing to go across the ocean.
And so I did.
Looking into the horizon, it soon began to morph into a cityscape, and at the foot of that cityscape, a beach with people bathing, enjoying the heat. I swam faster in anticipation. The depths were varying in degrees. Spots that should have been at least 100 feet, were only 2, and others vice versa. I could not make sense of the discrepancies, but was not scared anymore. Regardless of depth, the other side was visible. There was no longer an "ocean between us"...
I walked onto the beach - literally, another sea of people. Side by side, back to back. A sandy metropolis of chairs, oiled bodies and chatter. The sidewalk seemed so close, the skyscrapers leaning over the people. I walked to the bustling streets, looking for a phone.
I was carrying something, i don't remember what, but it was perishable and needed to be protected from the elements. I asked a street vendor to hold it for me, but refused. After that, it quickly became night so I entered a coffee shop/pastry boutique, white haired ladies buzzed behind the counter.
I leaned over and spoke in french to a sweet old woman who was also from my city and took pity on my situation, and gladly said she would hold onto my "package" until I came back from my meeting with you. I was releived.
I walked outside - and it seemed to be a mix of what i imagined LA to be (from what i see on tv LOL) and new york. Metropolitan hustle and bustle. I walked to a pay phone and become despondent that I had forgotten your number at home and began to panic.
Reaching to pick up the telephone book, i saw a photo of you - smiling, and holding your camera, looking up to a tall building. It was on the bottom part of a phone - sometimes a space used for giving useful information on emergency numbers, how to dial international numbers etc. I could not believe it! What were the chances!! I called the operator, explained my situation to her and told her who you were (and that you were on the phone box) and she immediately connected me to you, and as if by magic, you appeared!!
Oh we were so happy to see each-other! We jumped and hugged like two 50's school girls who had just scored tickets to see the Beatles. "we have so much to catch up on - so much to do!!" you said, as you led me by the hand into the heart of the city. I looked behind me and saw the ocean again - both sides of it - the new and old shore, both there, open, waiting for me to return, wishing me well on my new journey...
Oh my dear friend. I know that we have more journeys to take together, so many lessons to learn and teach each other and so many photographs to take. it's all a beginning, and perhaps is something that will never end. Some people I have met in my life I know I will meet again - soul travelers i call them. Please stay well. I know that life is difficult for you now, filled with melancholy and uncertainty, as is mine too, but as long as we can see both sides of the shore, we know that floating in the middle of the ocean is never a finite thing :-)
1 comment:
i've never dreamed i can fly. i guess that's fairly common, amongst dreamers. my most frequent dream, however, is that i can breathe underwater. mm.
many interpreters of dreams use elemental charts to place water as the emotions, as in the tarot, or as the subconscious, as in psychoanalysis.
the submersion does feel akin to that process, and i love it. i've never consciously wished i could fly—but i do wish i could literally breathe underwater.
your interpretation of your water dream is beautifully compelling.
i have to tell you: i was, for many years, a deep water ocean swimmer. i was very well trained, and had been on the beaches of san diego all my life, so the life guards had stopped bothering me about being a "bad example for tourists," by the time i was in my late teens.
in my mid-twenties, there was an actual tidal wave, with crests hitting over the top of La Jolla Pier, hit the waters, while i was swimming.
my girlfriend, at the time, was a non-swimmer, a transplant from farmland in illinois to san francisco. she was always concerned with the appearance of "bravado," and was already annoyed at the prospect of being on a beach, denuded of her leather gear. now, here she was, unable to help the femme caught in the hundred-foot waves. she was mad about it.
the tide pushed me into the pier, where i stupidly clutched, for a minute. a fisherman, whom i also considered stupid, for standing in those waves crashing well over his head (though perhaps he couldn't move) yelled down to me, "girl! are you okay?" i yelled up "no." he shouted, "you best be careful: those barnacles will cut the shit outta you."
i yelled back that i knew: the barnacles encrusted on the pier legs where already making deep gashes into my legs.
finally, i decided the sea is my friend. we'd been through a lot together. everything in my life, good or bad, could be celebrated or resolved there.
so i let go the pier, and the waves literally pushed me back to the beach.
where my girlfriend was standing, all angles, yelling about the bright orange lifeguard truck standing by to treat me.
i was fine *s
reality, for me, tends to outstrip my worst dreams.
my nights, at the worst, are filled with emblems of concern for my children and loved ones.
i awaken, and email or call the people in my dreams.
sometimes, i actually yell at people, for stuff they did in my dreams *s
ain't life grand?
thanks for pointing me to your blog.
~emmanuela, an erratic blogger, at best
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