Thursday, December 30, 2004
Last one for 2004.
I am back - but only for a short short blog.
Things have been up and down - been sick, lost my voice, found it again, and then lost it partially as of today. Looked under the bed, in the closet but it's nowhere to be found.
I am asking the universe for inspiration and strength for the new year.
I feel that I am on the cusp of something great. All I need is the energy and the focus to get through it all.
I am thankful for all the sunny days so far - they manage to get me through these winter months.
I took this photo last night at one of my gal pal's place. She is ripping up her bathroom of the downstairs apartment - it looks like hell - quite literally. We thought that something industrial would look cool. The idea behind this was ' a nice girl ends up in a bad place'. One night, you drink too much, black out for a little while, and then wake up to find yourself someplace where you know you should not be. I really think it works. The conditions were horrible (literally shit mixed with damp earth on the floor) - it was cold, damp and dark. I really had fun with her - we work really well together. She believe in my work and thinks this stuff is exhibition quality. I value her opinion highly - she is not one to give out compliments easily.
These are dark dark photos. Funny - the eye sees before the mind does.
On that note (oh - how depressing!!!) I wish all my readers a happy happy new year and may all your dreams come true in 2005!!!
Things have been up and down - been sick, lost my voice, found it again, and then lost it partially as of today. Looked under the bed, in the closet but it's nowhere to be found.
I am asking the universe for inspiration and strength for the new year.
I feel that I am on the cusp of something great. All I need is the energy and the focus to get through it all.
I am thankful for all the sunny days so far - they manage to get me through these winter months.
I took this photo last night at one of my gal pal's place. She is ripping up her bathroom of the downstairs apartment - it looks like hell - quite literally. We thought that something industrial would look cool. The idea behind this was ' a nice girl ends up in a bad place'. One night, you drink too much, black out for a little while, and then wake up to find yourself someplace where you know you should not be. I really think it works. The conditions were horrible (literally shit mixed with damp earth on the floor) - it was cold, damp and dark. I really had fun with her - we work really well together. She believe in my work and thinks this stuff is exhibition quality. I value her opinion highly - she is not one to give out compliments easily.
These are dark dark photos. Funny - the eye sees before the mind does.
On that note (oh - how depressing!!!) I wish all my readers a happy happy new year and may all your dreams come true in 2005!!!
Thursday, December 23, 2004
The night before the night before Xmas.
Lost my voice today. Not fun. Although it is kinda cool sounding like a big Italian mobster's wife (or at least what the stereotypical ones sound like - deep throaty sexy voice). I can talk but it hurts like hell and at times I sound like a 12 year old boy who's voice is in transition.
It was sooo miserable today.
I finished up some xmas presents, E got home and we did the last of the shopping rounds. It's strange having Xmas eve on a Friday. I can guarantee that there will be people taking full advantage of shopping till 9pm (if the stores stay open that long). Christmas in retail land. What fond (NOT!) memories...
The wind is whipping against the thin panes of glass of my window. I'm listening to Coldplay (let's go down a few notes on the scale of melancholia) and hoping to finish the last last little bit of xmas crafts and cooking. I can't believe a year has gone by so quickly. I really didn't notice the summer, and now, already the end of December? Wow. I can remember being a kid and asking how long it would be before I could cross a busy 4 lane street by myself. "Soon' seemed like forever in those days. Now, soon is too soon .
So Xmas rituals - tomorrow PM - E's parents house, eat, open presents, church, then back to pick up presents and left overs. Xmas day, mom and gmom's house - eat, eat and eat some more. 5 minutes of opening presents, sipping some eggnog for another hour and then home. In 24 hours it's all over.
Bleh.
I wish it were April already.
Buds start to poke out through the branches of the bare trees, the smell of dry earth and grass fill the air with a sweet crispness that just signals the beginning of spring. Its going to be along winter, unless I can find some $$ and get my white little butt to a hot tropical place between now and then...
Merry Xmas, Happy holidays and a fantastic new year everybody. ;-)
It was sooo miserable today.
I finished up some xmas presents, E got home and we did the last of the shopping rounds. It's strange having Xmas eve on a Friday. I can guarantee that there will be people taking full advantage of shopping till 9pm (if the stores stay open that long). Christmas in retail land. What fond (NOT!) memories...
The wind is whipping against the thin panes of glass of my window. I'm listening to Coldplay (let's go down a few notes on the scale of melancholia) and hoping to finish the last last little bit of xmas crafts and cooking. I can't believe a year has gone by so quickly. I really didn't notice the summer, and now, already the end of December? Wow. I can remember being a kid and asking how long it would be before I could cross a busy 4 lane street by myself. "Soon' seemed like forever in those days. Now, soon is too soon .
So Xmas rituals - tomorrow PM - E's parents house, eat, open presents, church, then back to pick up presents and left overs. Xmas day, mom and gmom's house - eat, eat and eat some more. 5 minutes of opening presents, sipping some eggnog for another hour and then home. In 24 hours it's all over.
Bleh.
I wish it were April already.
Buds start to poke out through the branches of the bare trees, the smell of dry earth and grass fill the air with a sweet crispness that just signals the beginning of spring. Its going to be along winter, unless I can find some $$ and get my white little butt to a hot tropical place between now and then...
Merry Xmas, Happy holidays and a fantastic new year everybody. ;-)
Deck the halls with germs and phlegm...
Man oh man. Those flu shots are shit!
I have been sick the past four days - four serious 'lying in my deathbed' days. The week before it was on and off, but since the weekend I have been growing roots into my mattress. I am up now because my coughing has kept me awake! I am trying to get myself drunk on 'cough/congestion due to colds' syrup so I can finally sleep!
I have been flipping out, trying to find last minute gifts for everybody. When all else fails, cookies and other sweets usually do the trick. Baked goods always get allot of 'oohs' and 'ahhhs' , especially when something is made from scratch. Standing near a hot oven sure beats dealing with irate salespeople, having to hear spoiled kids wailing and throw themselves on the floor in a grand mal temper tantrum, standing in line-ups longer than the breadlines in the former USSR. I thought I'd get creative this year, but that first attempt failed miserably. I have managed to save my sanity and 6 stretched canvases I bought with a good (but mind you, not very feasible) idea in mind. I won't say what it is in case one of you readers will be the recipient of one of these 'home made' gifts.
So just when I thought my life was back in the 'remedial' class, I get an email that almost had me tumble down the stairs (I live on the 3rd floor, so it's quite a tumble down)!! Somebody saw my profile on www.Mandy.com (a showbiz site - people who are looking for showbiz work) and emailed me asking if I wanted to be a writer on one of their comedy projects. I wrote back right away, telling them about the whole fiasco with the comedy network (that insane deadline thing) and that buried deep in my cerebellum was a degree in Creative Writing, which I pull out every once and a while to impress people at church bazaars and funerals.
I got an email back and on it the last line said:
Also the producer would like to speak to you.
The producer!! The producer of the production in question?? Wow!! Did I feel important!! Funny, just the other day I was asking a friend of mine if this 'comedy writing thing' was just a waste of my time, or did I really have a diamond in the rough? Long story made into a commercial, I spoke to the co-producer/director and got the info on the project. It sounds like something I can really sink my teeth (and those false chattering wind up teeth) into. The deadline is February (Pishaw!! February??! That is a vacation compared to the 5 hours I had to bang out a treatment!!) and are looking for someone who can write a play that will catch the attention of the viewing public. I am totally up to the challenge! I am also thinking that by networking with these two women, I might just be adding some creative elbow grease (and chick power) to my upcoming sketch-com project!!
I will keep you all posted as the events unfold...
So now, my carpal tunnel syndrome is setting in (the first time I heard that term, I could not figure out how somebody could suffer from 'Car-pool- tunnel syndrome?)*** and it's getting hard to type as I yelp between hitting the space bar and reaching over for the caps lock button...
So to all my readers - I wish you all a happy and wonderful Holiday season!!
** that is my skit idea so don't steal it!!
I have been sick the past four days - four serious 'lying in my deathbed' days. The week before it was on and off, but since the weekend I have been growing roots into my mattress. I am up now because my coughing has kept me awake! I am trying to get myself drunk on 'cough/congestion due to colds' syrup so I can finally sleep!
I have been flipping out, trying to find last minute gifts for everybody. When all else fails, cookies and other sweets usually do the trick. Baked goods always get allot of 'oohs' and 'ahhhs' , especially when something is made from scratch. Standing near a hot oven sure beats dealing with irate salespeople, having to hear spoiled kids wailing and throw themselves on the floor in a grand mal temper tantrum, standing in line-ups longer than the breadlines in the former USSR. I thought I'd get creative this year, but that first attempt failed miserably. I have managed to save my sanity and 6 stretched canvases I bought with a good (but mind you, not very feasible) idea in mind. I won't say what it is in case one of you readers will be the recipient of one of these 'home made' gifts.
So just when I thought my life was back in the 'remedial' class, I get an email that almost had me tumble down the stairs (I live on the 3rd floor, so it's quite a tumble down)!! Somebody saw my profile on www.Mandy.com (a showbiz site - people who are looking for showbiz work) and emailed me asking if I wanted to be a writer on one of their comedy projects. I wrote back right away, telling them about the whole fiasco with the comedy network (that insane deadline thing) and that buried deep in my cerebellum was a degree in Creative Writing, which I pull out every once and a while to impress people at church bazaars and funerals.
I got an email back and on it the last line said:
Also the producer would like to speak to you.
The producer!! The producer of the production in question?? Wow!! Did I feel important!! Funny, just the other day I was asking a friend of mine if this 'comedy writing thing' was just a waste of my time, or did I really have a diamond in the rough? Long story made into a commercial, I spoke to the co-producer/director and got the info on the project. It sounds like something I can really sink my teeth (and those false chattering wind up teeth) into. The deadline is February (Pishaw!! February??! That is a vacation compared to the 5 hours I had to bang out a treatment!!) and are looking for someone who can write a play that will catch the attention of the viewing public. I am totally up to the challenge! I am also thinking that by networking with these two women, I might just be adding some creative elbow grease (and chick power) to my upcoming sketch-com project!!
I will keep you all posted as the events unfold...
So now, my carpal tunnel syndrome is setting in (the first time I heard that term, I could not figure out how somebody could suffer from 'Car-pool- tunnel syndrome?)*** and it's getting hard to type as I yelp between hitting the space bar and reaching over for the caps lock button...
So to all my readers - I wish you all a happy and wonderful Holiday season!!
** that is my skit idea so don't steal it!!
Monday, December 20, 2004
Sunday, December 19, 2004
Cookies and more cookies!
What a wonderful time I had this afternoon!
E and I were invited to a friend's house where we were greeted with a warm welcome and a glass of hot wine a la Swedish style. I have never been to a cookie party, but I must admit, it was completely decadent! My Galpal told me that this was a family tradition in her country (and they have a Christmas goat, no Santa!!! )
Here junior, you've been so good all year, here is a bag of wool! Hoo hoo hoo!!
Sorry, had to add that in..
But the atmosphere was filled with smiles and laughter, everybody sampling more than a dozen sorts of treats and cakes. There were even gingerbread housed (which, unfortunately began to collapse because of humidity) that had lots of character. E said they were gingerbread houses from Florida because they were falling apart.
Gotta love the comedic relief!!
So on a grey and cold winter afternoon, we passed the time with some friends, both new and old. It really put me in the spirit of Christmas...
Now, I have to work like a fiend to get all my shopping done!!!!!
E and I were invited to a friend's house where we were greeted with a warm welcome and a glass of hot wine a la Swedish style. I have never been to a cookie party, but I must admit, it was completely decadent! My Galpal told me that this was a family tradition in her country (and they have a Christmas goat, no Santa!!! )
Here junior, you've been so good all year, here is a bag of wool! Hoo hoo hoo!!
Sorry, had to add that in..
But the atmosphere was filled with smiles and laughter, everybody sampling more than a dozen sorts of treats and cakes. There were even gingerbread housed (which, unfortunately began to collapse because of humidity) that had lots of character. E said they were gingerbread houses from Florida because they were falling apart.
Gotta love the comedic relief!!
So on a grey and cold winter afternoon, we passed the time with some friends, both new and old. It really put me in the spirit of Christmas...
Now, I have to work like a fiend to get all my shopping done!!!!!
Saturday, December 18, 2004
Went to a fun fun party last night - one of my old profs was having a little shin dig at her studio. I was not planning to attend initially. I really was planning to stay home in my tie dye yoga pants, my worn out Guns and Roses t-shirt that hangs so well off my bare shoulder, but after talking to my Bella chiqua gal pal (who was splishing around in the bathtub as we spoke) said :
''no questions asked. Just go!"
I heeded her advice because we were both in the same pms headspace. Staying at home when your hormones say 'feel sorry for me, I am a beached bloated pimply whale' is suicide. So I went, saying to myself:
this might actually be fun. Might...
I got there and was welcomed by old alumni - artists who smoked too much and loved their beer cold and domestic. It was a great cozy atmosphere as we all reminisced about the days before digital imaging became the photographic norm. I needed to reconnect with my old mentors and rejuvenate myself with art and their wisdom. As more people filtered in from the the cold, I felt so well lubed moving amidst the circles of old friends and new acquaintances with whom I shared a common passion. One of the teachers played DJ while grooving to Tina Turner, despite the continuous requests for something other than 'You better be good to me'. My wingspan grew as I spent the rest of the evening being a social butterfly and comedic relief.
Sometimes those 'nights' when you want to stay home and hide underneath the covers may not be the best medicine after all. I am a happy camper because I decided to be brave and hike out of my little cave .
Sunday I am going to a friend's cookie party. That should be fun. I made these delicious Cranberry white chocolate chunk shortbread cookies. A whole pound of butter and a block of white chocolate later, I have almost 80 little bundles of joy to share with my friends. How holiday is that?! I think that since I am so broke and creatively stumped this year, people are going to get the gift of sweets. Nothing says Xmas like red and green candy sprinkled shortbreads!!
Last night during the party E called me to relay some kick ass news!! He was driving on Mt. Royal and actually saw the famous shoe ad poster in the window of the store:
"Its HUGE and it looks great!!"
I almost dropped the phone from my hand.
"Now you have something to talk about at the party!!"
We drove by tonight but low and behold, the lights were all out and you could hardly see a thing, but being the geek I am, I pulled out my camera and took a photo anyway!! It is LIFE SIZE!! And looks great. I may have sold my soul on this one, but it's one hell of a poster for somebody who was as stressed and freaked out as a canary on cocaine!
Looking through the window, my face pressed against the glass, I said to myself:
Kudos!! Nice work... ;-)
And I was pleased...
Friday, December 17, 2004
Inspiration on a cold winter day.
Just got back from shooting some stuff for a friend of mine who did the complete interior design for a big Xmas party downtown. The stuff looked spectacular! It was a cross between the Moulin Rouge and a Turkish Harem. It was really quite awe inspiring taking into consideration the amount of effort and time this fantastic duo put into these decorations!! I was inspired, but not inspired on a personal artistic level. Now does that even make sense??
I found reasons to bitch - my new $??? lens is not wide enough, my flash was not firing properly, there were too many drunk and arrogant people, I was not paid for this gig...
A sweet sweet guypal of mine came over tonight. He is simply amazing in every sense of the word. This guy has had truckloads of shit shoveled in his direction and he still manages to bounce back with a smile on his face. We did some photoshop work while we sipped on some Guinness. That made my night...
So I am looking for inspiration as I critically review my work. I am my own harshest critic and am relentless in ripping apart my own stuff. This process keeps me from advancing sometimes - I don't like what I do, try to perfect it, but then end up hating that result as well... Little mouse in my head loosing steam on that little wheel he keeps spinning on...
Almost 3:30am. Now it's Friday.
I have not done any shopping or preparation for Xmas. All the decorations are sitting in a bag in front of the tree. Maybe the cats will take some initiative, at least play with the bows...
I have a whole list of my fave photographers - 'photographers extaordinaire' is the sub folder in my 'favorites' bookmarks section. One that I continue to come back to is Mark Romanek : http://www.markromanek.com/ This man is simply amazing. I would love love to meet him to pick his brain about all things aesthetic in photo and cinema.
Somebody told me the other day that my films and photos are really great and it's going to be a matter of time before I 'break into the market', make a name for myself. Sometimes, the doors that I pound on are just doors to empty places. My fingers and knuckes are getting a little bruised from knocking so hard and so long, but I can't give up now. That would defeat the purpose of me wanting to be a photographer/filmmaker.
LOL.
So much for a quick little blog before I went to sleep.
The sounds of slush being pushed through threaded radial tires during this quiet winter night add a tranquil ambience to my room. The 'woosh' reminds me of the ocean - the waves rolling up to the shore.
It's all water. It's all good in one form or another...
I found reasons to bitch - my new $??? lens is not wide enough, my flash was not firing properly, there were too many drunk and arrogant people, I was not paid for this gig...
A sweet sweet guypal of mine came over tonight. He is simply amazing in every sense of the word. This guy has had truckloads of shit shoveled in his direction and he still manages to bounce back with a smile on his face. We did some photoshop work while we sipped on some Guinness. That made my night...
So I am looking for inspiration as I critically review my work. I am my own harshest critic and am relentless in ripping apart my own stuff. This process keeps me from advancing sometimes - I don't like what I do, try to perfect it, but then end up hating that result as well... Little mouse in my head loosing steam on that little wheel he keeps spinning on...
Almost 3:30am. Now it's Friday.
I have not done any shopping or preparation for Xmas. All the decorations are sitting in a bag in front of the tree. Maybe the cats will take some initiative, at least play with the bows...
I have a whole list of my fave photographers - 'photographers extaordinaire' is the sub folder in my 'favorites' bookmarks section. One that I continue to come back to is Mark Romanek : http://www.markromanek.com/ This man is simply amazing. I would love love to meet him to pick his brain about all things aesthetic in photo and cinema.
Somebody told me the other day that my films and photos are really great and it's going to be a matter of time before I 'break into the market', make a name for myself. Sometimes, the doors that I pound on are just doors to empty places. My fingers and knuckes are getting a little bruised from knocking so hard and so long, but I can't give up now. That would defeat the purpose of me wanting to be a photographer/filmmaker.
LOL.
So much for a quick little blog before I went to sleep.
The sounds of slush being pushed through threaded radial tires during this quiet winter night add a tranquil ambience to my room. The 'woosh' reminds me of the ocean - the waves rolling up to the shore.
It's all water. It's all good in one form or another...
Wednesday, December 15, 2004
X Marks the spot, but a pimple says HELLO PMS!
hor·mone (hôrmn) n.
A substance, usually a peptide or steroid, produced by one tissue and conveyed by the bloodstream to another to effect physiological activity, such as growth or metabolism.
Well, they're back!!
The lovely army of hormones that tromp thorough my system, turning me into a wishy washy stew of emotions, distension of many of my extremities, and the all telling beacon of a lighthouse size zit on at least one part of my face.
When I hit my 20's I said to myself:
This is great! No more acne!
Then I hit my 30's and said:
Hey great! No more acne!!
I am still in my 30's, now pushing 40's and wonder what the joke is all about.
My uncle once told me:
If you have oily skin, you are less likely to get wrinkles...
I don't know what school of cosmetology he works for, but that's just pure bullshit!! I have the laugh lines to prove it!!
(as I laugh without trying to move my mouth...)
So apparently, when women 'hang out together', their cycles coincide. Apparently tiny little sensors in our noses pick up on theses hormonal changes of our fellow gal pals, putting us in sync with eachother's schedules. Why??
Good question!
Doing the Darwinian thing - I suspect that humans might have adopted this 'method of communal ovulation' so that if a man were to come across a particular tribe of ovulating women, chances of him striking out and not getting his little guys up and past the hills of Cervix were fewer if all the women in the tribe were fertile at the same time, rather than him having to make repeat visits at different times of the month for each woman.
Make sense?
I dunno. You tell me?
I am just pulling tampons out of a hat here...
I hit a bad day yesterday.
Went to see the headshrinker. She said:
I just do medication management...
So you are a pill pusher with an alphabet at the end of your name, but if I feel like my life is falling apart, you can't help me. Right?
She told me that I could always see my 'counsellor'.
This counsellor was as sweet as peach pie, but the woman would always fall asleep on me!
She would be listening, then her eyes would glaze over, roll back in her head a bit, and then the head would bob.
I was kind of shocked at first, thought maybe because she had a rough night, she was trying to catch some extra zzz's between paitents.
I didn't think it could be my stories - they are just too bizarre and outrageous.
So what the hell?
I tried going back several times a few years ago. There is nothing more frustrating than pouring your heart and intestines out and actually watch someone dip into a REM state while you are blubbering away.
So, no Doc. I aint going back to 'Sleepy' from that gaggle of head shrinking dwarfs.
She made a good point though - even though I could have told her that myself:
"You really come alive when you are doing work that you love. Try to keep yourself busy."
DUH!
I made a joke but obviously head shrinkers can't really take a joke when it is thrown to them, even if it's handed on a platter - they still fumble...
Well - it's settled! I have to move to L.A! I'll have the sun and the film work! I will be happier than a pig in -."
'Are you sure that would be a wise thing? You know, something like that should be reflected upon before making such a big move..."
I just looked at her, smirked and said:
'Joking'.
She tried to put some life into her fake laugh. I figured if I had to spend my day running around playing pharmaceutical Russian roulette with patients who were catatonic, I wouldn't be laughing much either.
So hormones, hormones, hormones.
I feel like there is some sort of 'Live Aid' concert going on in my system:
The gates have been knocked down, all the molecules in my body are alert for the big SHOW!
The various opening acts are just filler and fluff. A little opening act here - (backache), followed by another obscure act (migraine). As things warm up (cramps), the crowd starts to get restless (zits and craving for starch and carbs) and then the main attraction! BOOM! The crowd goes wild! My body goes into overdrive and all hell breaks loose.
Once again (it seemed like only yesterday I wrote about this) I am in the see-saw, roller coaster, yo-yo (why are all these up and down motion words hyphenated??) funhouse of flesh and bones (not hyphenated). Wee! Just 12 more days until the circus moves out of town!
A substance, usually a peptide or steroid, produced by one tissue and conveyed by the bloodstream to another to effect physiological activity, such as growth or metabolism.
Well, they're back!!
The lovely army of hormones that tromp thorough my system, turning me into a wishy washy stew of emotions, distension of many of my extremities, and the all telling beacon of a lighthouse size zit on at least one part of my face.
When I hit my 20's I said to myself:
This is great! No more acne!
Then I hit my 30's and said:
Hey great! No more acne!!
I am still in my 30's, now pushing 40's and wonder what the joke is all about.
My uncle once told me:
If you have oily skin, you are less likely to get wrinkles...
I don't know what school of cosmetology he works for, but that's just pure bullshit!! I have the laugh lines to prove it!!
(as I laugh without trying to move my mouth...)
So apparently, when women 'hang out together', their cycles coincide. Apparently tiny little sensors in our noses pick up on theses hormonal changes of our fellow gal pals, putting us in sync with eachother's schedules. Why??
Good question!
Doing the Darwinian thing - I suspect that humans might have adopted this 'method of communal ovulation' so that if a man were to come across a particular tribe of ovulating women, chances of him striking out and not getting his little guys up and past the hills of Cervix were fewer if all the women in the tribe were fertile at the same time, rather than him having to make repeat visits at different times of the month for each woman.
Make sense?
I dunno. You tell me?
I am just pulling tampons out of a hat here...
I hit a bad day yesterday.
Went to see the headshrinker. She said:
I just do medication management...
So you are a pill pusher with an alphabet at the end of your name, but if I feel like my life is falling apart, you can't help me. Right?
She told me that I could always see my 'counsellor'.
This counsellor was as sweet as peach pie, but the woman would always fall asleep on me!
She would be listening, then her eyes would glaze over, roll back in her head a bit, and then the head would bob.
I was kind of shocked at first, thought maybe because she had a rough night, she was trying to catch some extra zzz's between paitents.
I didn't think it could be my stories - they are just too bizarre and outrageous.
So what the hell?
I tried going back several times a few years ago. There is nothing more frustrating than pouring your heart and intestines out and actually watch someone dip into a REM state while you are blubbering away.
So, no Doc. I aint going back to 'Sleepy' from that gaggle of head shrinking dwarfs.
She made a good point though - even though I could have told her that myself:
"You really come alive when you are doing work that you love. Try to keep yourself busy."
DUH!
I made a joke but obviously head shrinkers can't really take a joke when it is thrown to them, even if it's handed on a platter - they still fumble...
Well - it's settled! I have to move to L.A! I'll have the sun and the film work! I will be happier than a pig in -."
'Are you sure that would be a wise thing? You know, something like that should be reflected upon before making such a big move..."
I just looked at her, smirked and said:
'Joking'.
She tried to put some life into her fake laugh. I figured if I had to spend my day running around playing pharmaceutical Russian roulette with patients who were catatonic, I wouldn't be laughing much either.
So hormones, hormones, hormones.
I feel like there is some sort of 'Live Aid' concert going on in my system:
The gates have been knocked down, all the molecules in my body are alert for the big SHOW!
The various opening acts are just filler and fluff. A little opening act here - (backache), followed by another obscure act (migraine). As things warm up (cramps), the crowd starts to get restless (zits and craving for starch and carbs) and then the main attraction! BOOM! The crowd goes wild! My body goes into overdrive and all hell breaks loose.
Once again (it seemed like only yesterday I wrote about this) I am in the see-saw, roller coaster, yo-yo (why are all these up and down motion words hyphenated??) funhouse of flesh and bones (not hyphenated). Wee! Just 12 more days until the circus moves out of town!
Sunday, December 12, 2004
The Party
This is going to be a short blog.
I am so hung over and so tired.
Back to my state of hibernation under my duvet...
Last night we had a little shin dig at our place.
Not many people were able to show up - weather, other 'festivas for the rest of us'* celebrations, but there was a good crowd. Munchies, smokes, and drinks enough for an army.
We had Rocky and Bullwinkle in the background for entertainment and visual stimulation.
I wonder if Rocket Robin Hood is available on DVD yet?
Stand all brothers, marching together,
heads held high in all kinds of weather,
with firery blasts our roaring rockets rise
beyond the earth,
beyond the skies....
Funny how house parties always have little pockets of activity - it seems that people always gather in the kitchen. Why is that? I mean, besides the availability and close proximity of the food and beer, what is it with kitchens??
There were two non-smokers in the whole place. They stayed in the neutral territory which was somewhere between the front (smoking room) and the kitchen.
E and I took turns keeping them company...
In between our smoke break room visits.
It was a lot of fun.
There is just something great about opening your house to people and entertaining.
I wish I had a big house just for that reason.
Of course, I would hire out the cleaning for the morning after, and develop a pill to magically cure hangovers as well...
Next week I am attending a 'cookie party' Sunday afternoon.
My baking sheets, Crisco shortening and vanilla extract are out and ready as I type this!
* Ahh - the magical Sienfeld references...
I am so hung over and so tired.
Back to my state of hibernation under my duvet...
Last night we had a little shin dig at our place.
Not many people were able to show up - weather, other 'festivas for the rest of us'* celebrations, but there was a good crowd. Munchies, smokes, and drinks enough for an army.
We had Rocky and Bullwinkle in the background for entertainment and visual stimulation.
I wonder if Rocket Robin Hood is available on DVD yet?
Stand all brothers, marching together,
heads held high in all kinds of weather,
with firery blasts our roaring rockets rise
beyond the earth,
beyond the skies....
Funny how house parties always have little pockets of activity - it seems that people always gather in the kitchen. Why is that? I mean, besides the availability and close proximity of the food and beer, what is it with kitchens??
There were two non-smokers in the whole place. They stayed in the neutral territory which was somewhere between the front (smoking room) and the kitchen.
E and I took turns keeping them company...
In between our smoke break room visits.
It was a lot of fun.
There is just something great about opening your house to people and entertaining.
I wish I had a big house just for that reason.
Of course, I would hire out the cleaning for the morning after, and develop a pill to magically cure hangovers as well...
Next week I am attending a 'cookie party' Sunday afternoon.
My baking sheets, Crisco shortening and vanilla extract are out and ready as I type this!
* Ahh - the magical Sienfeld references...
Friday, December 10, 2004
And the universe said...
And the universe said - you aint going nowhere tonight honey!!
I had it all planned. Dinner and drinks with a friend. I was getting ready when I got a msg telling me that they had to cancel on me last minute because they had to take some business clients out for dinner'. Okay, I didn't feel like eating out anyway. No biggie. Then I get a call from one of my director friends - "Hey lets meet for a beer and chew the fat!". Great idea! I wanted to know how he recovered from the screening night when the sound on his film botched up. So I get ready, running around the house, get to the metro, get as far as one stop down the line and then my night ended. They had to shut the whole system down for an indetermined period of time', which in metro talk means (hours). I waited almost an hour, leaving messages on his phone every 15 minutes, until about 10:20pm when I realized: "This night aint gonna happen!!". Disappointed and tired, I dragged my body 5 long long blocks home. For whatever reason, I had to stay home. I have yet to figure it out, but I got to see a funny episode of the Flintstones at 2am - the one where Fred's rich uncle is coming to visit and Barney gets disguised as 'Little Tex" - the oversized offspring of Fred and Wilma...
Its a horrible grey day. The umpteenth in a row.
This lack of sunlight is definitely wearing me down...
Note to self - don't miss the Flintstones tonight.
I am still eagerly waiting to see the episode where the two families encounter the 'Mad doctors' who switch everybody's personality while they sit under these primitive looking hair dryers:
"Len, Len, what have you done Len?"
"Well, my mother always told me - Be a mad doctor, be a mad doctor!!".
I had it all planned. Dinner and drinks with a friend. I was getting ready when I got a msg telling me that they had to cancel on me last minute because they had to take some business clients out for dinner'. Okay, I didn't feel like eating out anyway. No biggie. Then I get a call from one of my director friends - "Hey lets meet for a beer and chew the fat!". Great idea! I wanted to know how he recovered from the screening night when the sound on his film botched up. So I get ready, running around the house, get to the metro, get as far as one stop down the line and then my night ended. They had to shut the whole system down for an indetermined period of time', which in metro talk means (hours). I waited almost an hour, leaving messages on his phone every 15 minutes, until about 10:20pm when I realized: "This night aint gonna happen!!". Disappointed and tired, I dragged my body 5 long long blocks home. For whatever reason, I had to stay home. I have yet to figure it out, but I got to see a funny episode of the Flintstones at 2am - the one where Fred's rich uncle is coming to visit and Barney gets disguised as 'Little Tex" - the oversized offspring of Fred and Wilma...
Its a horrible grey day. The umpteenth in a row.
This lack of sunlight is definitely wearing me down...
Note to self - don't miss the Flintstones tonight.
I am still eagerly waiting to see the episode where the two families encounter the 'Mad doctors' who switch everybody's personality while they sit under these primitive looking hair dryers:
"Len, Len, what have you done Len?"
"Well, my mother always told me - Be a mad doctor, be a mad doctor!!".
Thursday, December 09, 2004
Cuba bound?
I actually had the opportunity and was asked if I wanted to leave to go to Havana tomorrow at 6pm. Had it not been such short notice, I would have packed my bags, grabbed my bikini, some suntan lotion and a sarong with some flip flops and hopped on a plane with no questions asked...
BUT...
Got the offer from one of the directors I worked with on a film this summer. Apparently, there is this Cuba/Canada exchange where as a gratuity (is that the right word) for taking a luggage load of medications, clothing, soaps and stuff over to Cuba, your flight is only $50 one way. The director knew another director who's brother had a place to stay right in Havana. Holy shit! That really was too good to be true.
Turned out that he had a last minute deadline for something that had to be done tomorrow without fail.
"Well, there goes the trip to Cuba..."
Well, there is always a next time...
I knew all those Spanish lessons would come in handy!!
So meeting with the director man was cool - he is uber talented and is just a really down to earth nice guy. I loved working on his film and met some great people (and a kick ass DOP with whom I hope to work with in the future). Even though we were not paid (hoping to be paid soon - all that $$ I spent on photos...) it was a life changing experience. It made me realize that being in film, and doing photography is where I am at my best. I am completely in my element and it shows. It is something that I need to do to stay creative and stay alive.
Tomorrow I am meeting with the club kids. I am not expecting much but know that I have to put on my business suit and nasty pants in order to get this contract. It is so not in my genetic make-up to be a business type', but I have to take on this new role in order to gain some respect and get some moula in my wallet. Besides, the other guy who they hired for the club is creepy and missing all his top front teeth. Who is going to want to smile and pose for a freak like that? No wonder all the pix on their website are so bad!!LOL
Off to bed. Had to do some printing of the pix to show them tomorrow. I am hoping that I will not get the run-around again. I am going to pull one of those 'sit-ins' and hang around until they show up. Would be kinda funny cause the club opens on Thursdays:
There I am, in my big down filled coat with a fur hood. My photo portfolio in tow, camera around my neck, waiting at the front steps for them to show up or haul me away (which I would have documented with my camera)...
Getting silly. Must rest. This weather is killing me. I feel like I am going into hibernation. Craving starchy foods like mad. Eating bread by the loaf and pasta by the pound! Oh Mr. Atkins? Where are you??
BUT...
Got the offer from one of the directors I worked with on a film this summer. Apparently, there is this Cuba/Canada exchange where as a gratuity (is that the right word) for taking a luggage load of medications, clothing, soaps and stuff over to Cuba, your flight is only $50 one way. The director knew another director who's brother had a place to stay right in Havana. Holy shit! That really was too good to be true.
Turned out that he had a last minute deadline for something that had to be done tomorrow without fail.
"Well, there goes the trip to Cuba..."
Well, there is always a next time...
I knew all those Spanish lessons would come in handy!!
So meeting with the director man was cool - he is uber talented and is just a really down to earth nice guy. I loved working on his film and met some great people (and a kick ass DOP with whom I hope to work with in the future). Even though we were not paid (hoping to be paid soon - all that $$ I spent on photos...) it was a life changing experience. It made me realize that being in film, and doing photography is where I am at my best. I am completely in my element and it shows. It is something that I need to do to stay creative and stay alive.
Tomorrow I am meeting with the club kids. I am not expecting much but know that I have to put on my business suit and nasty pants in order to get this contract. It is so not in my genetic make-up to be a business type', but I have to take on this new role in order to gain some respect and get some moula in my wallet. Besides, the other guy who they hired for the club is creepy and missing all his top front teeth. Who is going to want to smile and pose for a freak like that? No wonder all the pix on their website are so bad!!LOL
Off to bed. Had to do some printing of the pix to show them tomorrow. I am hoping that I will not get the run-around again. I am going to pull one of those 'sit-ins' and hang around until they show up. Would be kinda funny cause the club opens on Thursdays:
There I am, in my big down filled coat with a fur hood. My photo portfolio in tow, camera around my neck, waiting at the front steps for them to show up or haul me away (which I would have documented with my camera)...
Getting silly. Must rest. This weather is killing me. I feel like I am going into hibernation. Craving starchy foods like mad. Eating bread by the loaf and pasta by the pound! Oh Mr. Atkins? Where are you??
Monday, December 06, 2004
And then the rain came...
And then the rain came...
Where have I been the past few days??
a) under a rock
b) under my covers
c) someplace that I don't want to be
All of the above actually. The rock was more of a grey cloud, but has since lifted...
Wow. All that activity, excitement, panic, fuss and brouhaha has worn me out. And today, my body showed its appreciation.
For anybody who has suffered from migraines, the mere mention of the word can bring tears to one's eyes. For those of you who have been spared the misery, please allow me to explain - a migraine starts off feeling like a vice grip that has been attached to one side of your head, tightened so much that you can hear the metal scraping against metal. Your eyes are about to explode asthey hang by their last veins, and the back of your neck becomes so stiff, you can build a railway track on it. Any ray of light induces involuntary screams as you run for cover. Even the sound of dust settling sounds like 1000 hungry shreiking kids at a day care center. To sum up in one word? Hell.
I had one of those today.
When the all the insanity subsides, and the survival instinct dies down, the body wants to thank you for being such a slave-driver and running on nothing but fumes.
Hence - the MIGRAINE (it really merits caps).
Friday, went to see the screening of a film (at a film festival here) which I did cinematography work on.
It looked really swell, the images, the editing, graphics were top notch.
But the sound.
Oh boy, the sound, or lack of it.
The director and I knew at the getgo we were going to encounter some problems (without going into all the techy aspects), but this stuck out like a sore (mute) thumb in the final mix. There was one place in particular where the sound dropped out completly. From out of the corne of my eye, I watched the director bring his hands up to his face, his head into his hands, and then down into his lap. Speaking as a film person, I too have been there and know how incredibly humiliating a fuck up in your film can be during a premiere. All your work, all your blood, sweat and MONEY, in one moment can just amount to a holy mess. Not many people noticed this glitch, but for the director and I , those two minutes went by like weeks. I truly felt his pain... Poor guy. But the overall reception was good, people came up to both of us, congratulating us on our good work. Well, the way I see it, it's 'another film in the can, the next one - waiting to be loaded' (Show biz thing).
Saturday went to an office party with the man. It was being held in the company's warehouse (don't cringe yet, it actually looked really nice) decorated with all things Xmas. One of the more memorable moments was when the DJ led the crowd into a game of 'name that tune'. Each table had a captain and we had to keep track of specific songs that were given up in 10-20 second sound clips. There were songs from the 40's (like our table of 30somethings would know that much about music from the 30's!!), 40's, 50's right up until the late 90's. Our table was as mixed as a Christmas fruit cake - two couples, one in their mid 20's, the other - early 30's a few singles. The really quiet couple from China seemed politely pleasant at first, but as soon as the wine started pouring, they started rocking!! They were an absolute scream! The husband had me cracking up all night:
He puts up two fingers.
"How many finger you see?"
"Ah, two...'
"Ah! you see only two finger? You not drink enough!!"
He was laughing and laughing. His petite wife politely put her hand over her mouth and laughed and laughed as well. I was stunned at first - the irony of the joke, and the person that said it, but then I was surprised by how hysterical they found it. I burst out into a holler.
He reached over to the bottle of wine in the middle of the table:
"Here, drink more!! You too far behind!"
The inside sight joke was two fingers in the air, which we did to eachother all night. It was a great little moment.
I bought a kick ass lens for my camera on Sunday (and why I am telling you this I have no clue, Oh wait! It's because this is my blog and I CAN!!) - put down 400 cool ones. I had to replace my ould one because I dropped it. Yea, I know, butterfingers. Note to self : bungee cord everything of value and importance in my life to my body.
So this up coming Friday, there is another deadline for another film thing. I'm not stressing about it too much. I figure, if I can pull of what I did last week in less than 5 hours, this one will be a slice of pie. But then again, I have to get cracking. God knows I don't want another migraine on Sunday from sticking my brain into a pressure cooker.
Weird dream:
(I thought I would include these dreams becasue some are just too hysterical not to be recounted, even if they don't make any sense) .
I found myself stranded on some island, out past Australia (must be from watching all those ads for 'winter getaways'). The plane landed on a dock, Fantasy Island style, and the passangers had to get out and waddle through to the water(which was a beautiful turquoise), but still, waist deep tugging a sinking suitcase was not the ideal thing to be doing in the ocean, or on a beach.
I walked into this huge, (yet cottage like) looking hotel. It was absolutley enormous and very modern - a stark contrast to the quaint New England type home that it was on the outside.
There were glass elevators, slate/granite walls and floors that oozed of minimalist modernism. I walked up to the concierge counter and told the woman that someone had made a mistake - I was not supposed to be there, and I needed a ticket home as soon as possible. Because it was a dream, and I have yet to master the art of 'lucid dreaming', she told me that I was out of luck, and if I wanted to stay, it would cost me $700 us a night to stay. Holy crap! Even in dream currency that is steep!
The next set of sequences had me running to all these airline counters in the hopes of finding a cheap flight out; one clerk informing me that it was a 48 hour plane ride back home (where the hell were we??). After begging and pleading with the Air Canada ticket, she finally gave me a last minute deal (even in my dream, she was a real disgruntled bitch!!) and could squeeze me into a shorter flight.
The plane was not really a plane. It had a sun deck at the nose of the plane, equipped with chairs (which were all bolted down), a whirlpool that was actually a part of the ocean, and stewardesses who read the first class passengers a good night story before they fell asleep.
I got off somewhere in L.A near a beach. To my surprise, I had company with me - a bunch of really Italina girls who were trying to find a 'friend's' house. As we walked back and fourth (quite literally), we caught sight and ran into Robert DeNiro with a few of his buddies. These two groups kinda knew eachother but Mr. DeNiro singled me out, paid special attention to me, flirted with me heavily, and then gave me everything short of his measurements so I could get in touch with him later on.
"Here is a card from my bank manager. Call him tomorrow..."
He had this endless stack of cards which he pulled from his pocket. The wallet was simmilar to the one GEORGE had in Sienfeld - so stuffed that it made George sit on a slant becasue it was so packed in with papers...
I took each card, smiling pleasantly, putting them into my now over-stuffed silver evening bag.
"Did you get this one? With my email? Hold on..."
He took out a pen, brought his knee up to his chest, and scrawled something on the back of a beige card: bobbydin@yahoo.com. The loops in his o's were so squished together, it looked like one huge ink smudge.
"Call me tomorrow, no, wait, I don't have a phone, email me okay sweetie!? I will be waiting for you!"
As I walked away, perplexed and amused, the more outspoken woman of the group looked at me like she was going to punch me in the face - with her whole arm and forearm. One of the sisters whispered to me:
"She LOVES Bobby! She has been trying for months to get in touch with him!! You are one lucky woman, but also unlucky as well."
I had a funny feeling this dream was not going to end nicely.
After getting into the apartment, a series of screwball antics played out like a Benny Hill show on fast forward. Sensing her wrath, I knew I had to hide from this DeNiro fan. I grabbed a nearby purple wig, and asked the cat to help me find a place to hide. She meowed towards the direction of the bed. It was a kid's bed and my legs dangled over the edge. Underneath the covers, I could hear voices coming in my direction. As luck would have it, she ended up sitting on my legs, but I couldn't scream. Bitching about me and how she was going to use my face to scrub all her dirty pots and pans, the infamous Bobby D. shows up. Looking around the room as he sauntered in, he said: "Ladies, she is my girl, so lay off!"
He too pulled out a purple wig from thin air, yanked back the covers, took my hand and lead all of us to a nearby Burger King.
I wonder if his ears were burning, or having visions of business cards falling from the sky today...
Where have I been the past few days??
a) under a rock
b) under my covers
c) someplace that I don't want to be
All of the above actually. The rock was more of a grey cloud, but has since lifted...
Wow. All that activity, excitement, panic, fuss and brouhaha has worn me out. And today, my body showed its appreciation.
For anybody who has suffered from migraines, the mere mention of the word can bring tears to one's eyes. For those of you who have been spared the misery, please allow me to explain - a migraine starts off feeling like a vice grip that has been attached to one side of your head, tightened so much that you can hear the metal scraping against metal. Your eyes are about to explode asthey hang by their last veins, and the back of your neck becomes so stiff, you can build a railway track on it. Any ray of light induces involuntary screams as you run for cover. Even the sound of dust settling sounds like 1000 hungry shreiking kids at a day care center. To sum up in one word? Hell.
I had one of those today.
When the all the insanity subsides, and the survival instinct dies down, the body wants to thank you for being such a slave-driver and running on nothing but fumes.
Hence - the MIGRAINE (it really merits caps).
Friday, went to see the screening of a film (at a film festival here) which I did cinematography work on.
It looked really swell, the images, the editing, graphics were top notch.
But the sound.
Oh boy, the sound, or lack of it.
The director and I knew at the getgo we were going to encounter some problems (without going into all the techy aspects), but this stuck out like a sore (mute) thumb in the final mix. There was one place in particular where the sound dropped out completly. From out of the corne of my eye, I watched the director bring his hands up to his face, his head into his hands, and then down into his lap. Speaking as a film person, I too have been there and know how incredibly humiliating a fuck up in your film can be during a premiere. All your work, all your blood, sweat and MONEY, in one moment can just amount to a holy mess. Not many people noticed this glitch, but for the director and I , those two minutes went by like weeks. I truly felt his pain... Poor guy. But the overall reception was good, people came up to both of us, congratulating us on our good work. Well, the way I see it, it's 'another film in the can, the next one - waiting to be loaded' (Show biz thing).
Saturday went to an office party with the man. It was being held in the company's warehouse (don't cringe yet, it actually looked really nice) decorated with all things Xmas. One of the more memorable moments was when the DJ led the crowd into a game of 'name that tune'. Each table had a captain and we had to keep track of specific songs that were given up in 10-20 second sound clips. There were songs from the 40's (like our table of 30somethings would know that much about music from the 30's!!), 40's, 50's right up until the late 90's. Our table was as mixed as a Christmas fruit cake - two couples, one in their mid 20's, the other - early 30's a few singles. The really quiet couple from China seemed politely pleasant at first, but as soon as the wine started pouring, they started rocking!! They were an absolute scream! The husband had me cracking up all night:
He puts up two fingers.
"How many finger you see?"
"Ah, two...'
"Ah! you see only two finger? You not drink enough!!"
He was laughing and laughing. His petite wife politely put her hand over her mouth and laughed and laughed as well. I was stunned at first - the irony of the joke, and the person that said it, but then I was surprised by how hysterical they found it. I burst out into a holler.
He reached over to the bottle of wine in the middle of the table:
"Here, drink more!! You too far behind!"
The inside sight joke was two fingers in the air, which we did to eachother all night. It was a great little moment.
I bought a kick ass lens for my camera on Sunday (and why I am telling you this I have no clue, Oh wait! It's because this is my blog and I CAN!!) - put down 400 cool ones. I had to replace my ould one because I dropped it. Yea, I know, butterfingers. Note to self : bungee cord everything of value and importance in my life to my body.
So this up coming Friday, there is another deadline for another film thing. I'm not stressing about it too much. I figure, if I can pull of what I did last week in less than 5 hours, this one will be a slice of pie. But then again, I have to get cracking. God knows I don't want another migraine on Sunday from sticking my brain into a pressure cooker.
Weird dream:
(I thought I would include these dreams becasue some are just too hysterical not to be recounted, even if they don't make any sense) .
I found myself stranded on some island, out past Australia (must be from watching all those ads for 'winter getaways'). The plane landed on a dock, Fantasy Island style, and the passangers had to get out and waddle through to the water(which was a beautiful turquoise), but still, waist deep tugging a sinking suitcase was not the ideal thing to be doing in the ocean, or on a beach.
I walked into this huge, (yet cottage like) looking hotel. It was absolutley enormous and very modern - a stark contrast to the quaint New England type home that it was on the outside.
There were glass elevators, slate/granite walls and floors that oozed of minimalist modernism. I walked up to the concierge counter and told the woman that someone had made a mistake - I was not supposed to be there, and I needed a ticket home as soon as possible. Because it was a dream, and I have yet to master the art of 'lucid dreaming', she told me that I was out of luck, and if I wanted to stay, it would cost me $700 us a night to stay. Holy crap! Even in dream currency that is steep!
The next set of sequences had me running to all these airline counters in the hopes of finding a cheap flight out; one clerk informing me that it was a 48 hour plane ride back home (where the hell were we??). After begging and pleading with the Air Canada ticket, she finally gave me a last minute deal (even in my dream, she was a real disgruntled bitch!!) and could squeeze me into a shorter flight.
The plane was not really a plane. It had a sun deck at the nose of the plane, equipped with chairs (which were all bolted down), a whirlpool that was actually a part of the ocean, and stewardesses who read the first class passengers a good night story before they fell asleep.
I got off somewhere in L.A near a beach. To my surprise, I had company with me - a bunch of really Italina girls who were trying to find a 'friend's' house. As we walked back and fourth (quite literally), we caught sight and ran into Robert DeNiro with a few of his buddies. These two groups kinda knew eachother but Mr. DeNiro singled me out, paid special attention to me, flirted with me heavily, and then gave me everything short of his measurements so I could get in touch with him later on.
"Here is a card from my bank manager. Call him tomorrow..."
He had this endless stack of cards which he pulled from his pocket. The wallet was simmilar to the one GEORGE had in Sienfeld - so stuffed that it made George sit on a slant becasue it was so packed in with papers...
I took each card, smiling pleasantly, putting them into my now over-stuffed silver evening bag.
"Did you get this one? With my email? Hold on..."
He took out a pen, brought his knee up to his chest, and scrawled something on the back of a beige card: bobbydin@yahoo.com. The loops in his o's were so squished together, it looked like one huge ink smudge.
"Call me tomorrow, no, wait, I don't have a phone, email me okay sweetie!? I will be waiting for you!"
As I walked away, perplexed and amused, the more outspoken woman of the group looked at me like she was going to punch me in the face - with her whole arm and forearm. One of the sisters whispered to me:
"She LOVES Bobby! She has been trying for months to get in touch with him!! You are one lucky woman, but also unlucky as well."
I had a funny feeling this dream was not going to end nicely.
After getting into the apartment, a series of screwball antics played out like a Benny Hill show on fast forward. Sensing her wrath, I knew I had to hide from this DeNiro fan. I grabbed a nearby purple wig, and asked the cat to help me find a place to hide. She meowed towards the direction of the bed. It was a kid's bed and my legs dangled over the edge. Underneath the covers, I could hear voices coming in my direction. As luck would have it, she ended up sitting on my legs, but I couldn't scream. Bitching about me and how she was going to use my face to scrub all her dirty pots and pans, the infamous Bobby D. shows up. Looking around the room as he sauntered in, he said: "Ladies, she is my girl, so lay off!"
He too pulled out a purple wig from thin air, yanked back the covers, took my hand and lead all of us to a nearby Burger King.
I wonder if his ears were burning, or having visions of business cards falling from the sky today...
Thursday, December 02, 2004
"Looks Like We Made It' !!!
So I did it!
I beat the time limit and managed to submit that stupid treatment in before it was too late! I am a nervous wreck right now, and decompressing is a must or my brain will explode, but I am so happy!! I DID IT!! WHOOO HOOOO!
I had the option of either missing the appointment with the club people for the photo contract or missing a chance to get my stuff (at least) into the doors of the Comedy Network. I weighed the options: Club people? Often unreliable (like yesterday when I showed up for nothing as they has just convened an 'emergency meeting and were unable to see me) or have the opportunity for some people who actually work in the comedy/TV industry which I would DIE to get into, look over some of (at least what I think is funny) my sketch pieces. It was a double gamble. I threw the dice and decided to glue my eyes to the monitor and entwine my fingers around my keyboard until I brought to term that baby of a comedic embryo. I had a few friends call me during my pinnacle moment of momentum who were curtyly greeted with: "Hey! I can't talk I am writing this comedy thing and I am on a deadline cant stop now to think am in the middle of a FLOW I'll call you later I gotta go BYE!'' which was all said before they even had a chance to say 'Hello'! I guess it was some sort of comedic 'survival instinct' that drove me to finish, and finish with zeal. I wonder if the cavemen used humour to get themselves out of 'sticky' situations? One cave man finds you sleeping with his woman. He is about to club you to death. What do you do? Act like an idiot! Wave your arms around in the air, and wail like a rabid complete idiot monkey must have gone over really well at the tar pits! I guess it would stand to reason why some people have a more acute sense of timing and sense of humour than others. As Rodney Daingerfield said: "I get no respect!", but comedians might very well be one of the secret links/reasons as to why we, as a species, have survived as long as we have! Without the ability to laugh at ourselves, and the human folly, I think people would have killed themselves off a long time go!
So back to my 'episode'...
I was sitting at the computer, my eyes bugging out, as dry as sandpaper cause I had not blinked in more than an hour, my fingers cramping into a twisted mess from typing in a damp room for so long, when I caught a glimpse of the BIG PUNCH LINE in the distance. It was 6:15pm and the FedEx offices were closing at 7pm. I had a little over 40 minutes to print all the stuff, hop in the car, zip downtown, fill out the waybill (that alone takes 10 minutes and a tech. Vocational degree) and bid my proposal a safe trip down the 401. As you would expect, the printer slowed down, the paper jammed, I had to do a spell check, my headers and footers began to appear on the top, bottom and sides of every document, and outside, the steady flow of Thursday night traffic was congealing like a layer of cold fat in a pot of fresh chicken broth.
6:35pm: I could feel those 'nervous hives' furiously percolating beneath the surface of my skin.
My man began to state the obvious:
"you know you wont have enough time to -'.
I held up one hand in the air as the other blindly fiddled and filed sheets of paper. He knew then not to say any more. I hate to think what I would have done had he continued to orate as my other hand unconsciously groaped for the stapler...
6:38pm: I was crossing the 4 lane busy street without any regard to the oncoming speeding traffic: you can kill me but you cant kill my IDEA, MY DREAM!! We were rolling at 6:40pm.
The next 20 minutes were a complete blur. Time seemed to speed up, and then slow down at every stop sign, every imbecile that got their licence out of a pre-foamed soap dispenser box, every old person and woman with a baby who thought they could begin to cross the street as the light turned yellow. My day flashed before my eyes. My whole career flashed before my eyes. I felt dizzy and my muscles were as brittle as Billy Idol's hair. Can we make it? Can we do this? IF there is a GOD, and this is meant to be, I will get there in time...
So between me and the man, we managed to get our directions wrong. He said FedEx and I said I knew where it was. Without even stopping the car, I rolled out of the passenger seat T.J. Hooker style, stumbled onto the sidewalk and ran towards the outlet. I think I must have lost consciousness for a nano-second as I realized that I was running towards a sign that said Purolator , not the FedEx, but miraculously, my legs kept on moving and did not come to a screeching halt, not listening my mind that whispered in a feeble and tiny voice saying: ' Oh fuck. Its not FedEx...'.
I almost whipped the door off of its hinges (an adrenaline rush can give you incredible strength - remember baby Superman in the movie when he lifts the car above his tiny little head?) and stumbled to the counter. In between gasps I asked:
"What time is your last pick-up?"
I was waiting for that dammed "Acme" cartoon anvil to come falling from the sky - the Purolator clerk being the Road Runner, and me - the coyote.
"To Toronto? Oh, its at 9pm.' In a Julie Andrews sing- song voice she smiled: "You still have lots of time - its only a minute shy of 7."
My body didn't know whether to collapse in exhaustion, dance around like a crazy fool, freeze completely from the state of shock or burst out crying. I think I might have done all of them simultaneously, and because of the sheer magnitude and intensity of all those feelings, they managed to cancel each other out. I blurted out in a monotone voice:
'Oh my God. You are the best. I am going to name my first child Purolator."
She kind of snickered and looked at me in a weird way, not knowing whether to take me seriously or call 911.
We did the paperwork, and while filling out the waybill, I opened the floodgates and blathered on about the contents of the envelope, my childhood dream to become a comedian, "Take my parents, please!" and how fate and the universe had steered me to this office. I am convinced people like me are the reason why companies like Purolator have such amazing employee benefits and generous sick days...
I carefully put my envelope into another envelope (a fancy paper condom), sealed it, and made the sign of the cross over the waybill.
"Godspeed', I mumbled under my breath. I handed her the red, blue and white envelope and thanked her for making my night, weekend, beginning of the month and end of the year. A little niceness goes a long way. As I type this, I am hoping that what comes around goes around, and that some creative mind in Toronto will look at my script and say: "My God. This is brilliant. This is IT."
But if not, I am happy to know that there was a small miracle waiting for me around the corner, and that perhaps, I made somebody's day a little brighter by being thankful that they were there when I needed them.
I beat the time limit and managed to submit that stupid treatment in before it was too late! I am a nervous wreck right now, and decompressing is a must or my brain will explode, but I am so happy!! I DID IT!! WHOOO HOOOO!
I had the option of either missing the appointment with the club people for the photo contract or missing a chance to get my stuff (at least) into the doors of the Comedy Network. I weighed the options: Club people? Often unreliable (like yesterday when I showed up for nothing as they has just convened an 'emergency meeting and were unable to see me) or have the opportunity for some people who actually work in the comedy/TV industry which I would DIE to get into, look over some of (at least what I think is funny) my sketch pieces. It was a double gamble. I threw the dice and decided to glue my eyes to the monitor and entwine my fingers around my keyboard until I brought to term that baby of a comedic embryo. I had a few friends call me during my pinnacle moment of momentum who were curtyly greeted with: "Hey! I can't talk I am writing this comedy thing and I am on a deadline cant stop now to think am in the middle of a FLOW I'll call you later I gotta go BYE!'' which was all said before they even had a chance to say 'Hello'! I guess it was some sort of comedic 'survival instinct' that drove me to finish, and finish with zeal. I wonder if the cavemen used humour to get themselves out of 'sticky' situations? One cave man finds you sleeping with his woman. He is about to club you to death. What do you do? Act like an idiot! Wave your arms around in the air, and wail like a rabid complete idiot monkey must have gone over really well at the tar pits! I guess it would stand to reason why some people have a more acute sense of timing and sense of humour than others. As Rodney Daingerfield said: "I get no respect!", but comedians might very well be one of the secret links/reasons as to why we, as a species, have survived as long as we have! Without the ability to laugh at ourselves, and the human folly, I think people would have killed themselves off a long time go!
So back to my 'episode'...
I was sitting at the computer, my eyes bugging out, as dry as sandpaper cause I had not blinked in more than an hour, my fingers cramping into a twisted mess from typing in a damp room for so long, when I caught a glimpse of the BIG PUNCH LINE in the distance. It was 6:15pm and the FedEx offices were closing at 7pm. I had a little over 40 minutes to print all the stuff, hop in the car, zip downtown, fill out the waybill (that alone takes 10 minutes and a tech. Vocational degree) and bid my proposal a safe trip down the 401. As you would expect, the printer slowed down, the paper jammed, I had to do a spell check, my headers and footers began to appear on the top, bottom and sides of every document, and outside, the steady flow of Thursday night traffic was congealing like a layer of cold fat in a pot of fresh chicken broth.
6:35pm: I could feel those 'nervous hives' furiously percolating beneath the surface of my skin.
My man began to state the obvious:
"you know you wont have enough time to -'.
I held up one hand in the air as the other blindly fiddled and filed sheets of paper. He knew then not to say any more. I hate to think what I would have done had he continued to orate as my other hand unconsciously groaped for the stapler...
6:38pm: I was crossing the 4 lane busy street without any regard to the oncoming speeding traffic: you can kill me but you cant kill my IDEA, MY DREAM!! We were rolling at 6:40pm.
The next 20 minutes were a complete blur. Time seemed to speed up, and then slow down at every stop sign, every imbecile that got their licence out of a pre-foamed soap dispenser box, every old person and woman with a baby who thought they could begin to cross the street as the light turned yellow. My day flashed before my eyes. My whole career flashed before my eyes. I felt dizzy and my muscles were as brittle as Billy Idol's hair. Can we make it? Can we do this? IF there is a GOD, and this is meant to be, I will get there in time...
So between me and the man, we managed to get our directions wrong. He said FedEx and I said I knew where it was. Without even stopping the car, I rolled out of the passenger seat T.J. Hooker style, stumbled onto the sidewalk and ran towards the outlet. I think I must have lost consciousness for a nano-second as I realized that I was running towards a sign that said Purolator , not the FedEx, but miraculously, my legs kept on moving and did not come to a screeching halt, not listening my mind that whispered in a feeble and tiny voice saying: ' Oh fuck. Its not FedEx...'.
I almost whipped the door off of its hinges (an adrenaline rush can give you incredible strength - remember baby Superman in the movie when he lifts the car above his tiny little head?) and stumbled to the counter. In between gasps I asked:
"What time is your last pick-up?"
I was waiting for that dammed "Acme" cartoon anvil to come falling from the sky - the Purolator clerk being the Road Runner, and me - the coyote.
"To Toronto? Oh, its at 9pm.' In a Julie Andrews sing- song voice she smiled: "You still have lots of time - its only a minute shy of 7."
My body didn't know whether to collapse in exhaustion, dance around like a crazy fool, freeze completely from the state of shock or burst out crying. I think I might have done all of them simultaneously, and because of the sheer magnitude and intensity of all those feelings, they managed to cancel each other out. I blurted out in a monotone voice:
'Oh my God. You are the best. I am going to name my first child Purolator."
She kind of snickered and looked at me in a weird way, not knowing whether to take me seriously or call 911.
We did the paperwork, and while filling out the waybill, I opened the floodgates and blathered on about the contents of the envelope, my childhood dream to become a comedian, "Take my parents, please!" and how fate and the universe had steered me to this office. I am convinced people like me are the reason why companies like Purolator have such amazing employee benefits and generous sick days...
I carefully put my envelope into another envelope (a fancy paper condom), sealed it, and made the sign of the cross over the waybill.
"Godspeed', I mumbled under my breath. I handed her the red, blue and white envelope and thanked her for making my night, weekend, beginning of the month and end of the year. A little niceness goes a long way. As I type this, I am hoping that what comes around goes around, and that some creative mind in Toronto will look at my script and say: "My God. This is brilliant. This is IT."
But if not, I am happy to know that there was a small miracle waiting for me around the corner, and that perhaps, I made somebody's day a little brighter by being thankful that they were there when I needed them.
Wednesday, December 01, 2004
Tick Tock!
I am in a state of perpetual panic - there are so many deadlines coming up, the most important being Friday for that Comedy Network thing. I have been kinda putting it off for some time now. I manage to open the file, shift a few words around, look at it and then pop Photoshop open to fix some photos to pass the time - all in the name of 'creative inspiration'. But that really gets me nowhere fast, and the hours are slipping by. You would think after more than 30 years of schooling, I would know by now that procrastination does NOT WORK!! Although I do my best work when I am under pressure, but that would explain the three ulcers I had in my stomach a few years ago - one for each degree!! LOL
I have to go locations scouting for a friend of mine tomorrow, then a meeting with some people that I might be doing some photo work with, other errands and lots of bla bla bla. I cant seem to squeeze it into the day! Daylight savings time sucks the bag.
Well, today was a complete waste - ran downtown to see a friend of mine who was supposed to put me in touch with these club people who want to use my services, but he lost the photos of the club I made for him, and to top it all off, the owners of the club were having an 'emergency meeting':
"I hope you did not come all the way down here in this shitty weather just for this?"
Of course I had to lie - I didn't want this guy to feel more horrible than he already did!
So I schlepped home, all dressed and made up with my truckload of photos under one arm, and a broken HelloKitty umbrella in the other. Well, I got good use out of my "new' buss pass today, and got to experience the efficiency of the transit system. YAWN!!
A film I worked on (was the cinematographer) will be playing on Friday. I am soo pumped! I met the director through a want ad on www.mandy.com . He was looking for someone to be his DOP (techie lingo - means director of photography) so I volunteered. It was for no pay and was to be part of some crazy film fest where all the teams have 48 hours to write, film, edit and finish their oeuvre in the time allotted. Well, it was an experience and the last film we worked on was not as 'time restricted, but we had enough obstacles to overcome. Working on these films proved to me, yet again, that I work best under pressure , provided I am given enough space to:
a) flip out
b) scream/cry hysterically
c) chill by myself in complete silence
d) be outrageously creative and try the otherwise impossible.
Not that these things all happen during every shoot, or they happen to that extent, but I am quite the sight to behold when those wheels are spinning and the clock is going tick tock!
I have to go locations scouting for a friend of mine tomorrow, then a meeting with some people that I might be doing some photo work with, other errands and lots of bla bla bla. I cant seem to squeeze it into the day! Daylight savings time sucks the bag.
Well, today was a complete waste - ran downtown to see a friend of mine who was supposed to put me in touch with these club people who want to use my services, but he lost the photos of the club I made for him, and to top it all off, the owners of the club were having an 'emergency meeting':
"I hope you did not come all the way down here in this shitty weather just for this?"
Of course I had to lie - I didn't want this guy to feel more horrible than he already did!
So I schlepped home, all dressed and made up with my truckload of photos under one arm, and a broken HelloKitty umbrella in the other. Well, I got good use out of my "new' buss pass today, and got to experience the efficiency of the transit system. YAWN!!
A film I worked on (was the cinematographer) will be playing on Friday. I am soo pumped! I met the director through a want ad on www.mandy.com . He was looking for someone to be his DOP (techie lingo - means director of photography) so I volunteered. It was for no pay and was to be part of some crazy film fest where all the teams have 48 hours to write, film, edit and finish their oeuvre in the time allotted. Well, it was an experience and the last film we worked on was not as 'time restricted, but we had enough obstacles to overcome. Working on these films proved to me, yet again, that I work best under pressure , provided I am given enough space to:
a) flip out
b) scream/cry hysterically
c) chill by myself in complete silence
d) be outrageously creative and try the otherwise impossible.
Not that these things all happen during every shoot, or they happen to that extent, but I am quite the sight to behold when those wheels are spinning and the clock is going tick tock!
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