Doing the pop-in

Hi all!
I am just doing a little pop in, even though I am soooooo sick!
Can you believe it - we are only a few days into spring and I have a horrible COLD! Yep. Stuffy nose, runny nose, cough, stuffy head, sneezing. Although I am fearing that it might be flu (even more exciting) but I don't want to jinx myself... Colds in spring and summer are the worst - I feel like a kid who can't go out to play her friends because I am sick and had to stay home. Looking out the window, sulking, sniffling.
Yuks Sucks.

So a brief update on the goings on lately (I have been severely traumatized by Blogger eradicating my really great blog entry a few days ago, so I have been afraid to post lately...) as they have been few, but interesting...

a) went to the rehearsal on Monday. I have never acted in a play before, and the only acting I have done has been for film, and as I mentioned before, theater and film are two COMPLETELY different animals! So acting for film is like the cut and past version of show business. One snippet here, pause (CUT!) and then by the wonderful magic of cinema, you are now in a scene 2 years later and talking to someone else. But in theater - it's all on the stage, minimal props, no 'cut and lets have you run through that again' stuff - if you mess up on stage during a performance, there are no second chances. And rehearsal is a little different as well. It's all in the body and projection of voice. All this is news to me, so my first rehearsal was an adventure!!

b) went to my interview for a group at the local hospital that specializes in CBT - cognitive behavioral therapy. It's an interesting branch of psychiatry as it looks at negative thought patterns and how you can change them - like changing a skipping cd track. CBT also looks at the relationship between thought and feelings and how if you alter one for the better, the latter is sure to follow... But more on that later.

THE REHEARSAL:
My first pre-warning from Charlotte (who is also the director) was - DON'T BE LATE FOR REHEARSALS!! Others show up on time, and so should you! Apparently most actors are prima donnas and don't like to wait while others hold up the show. Point taken.

So I was there - 6pm on the nose. Samantha and I were the only ones there!! Even Charlotte came in late! Okay, let it slide, first rehearsal...
Being someone who is almost always on the other side of the camera, I was introduced to some wacky techniques for warming up: tongue twisters (Fat fanny flips for food - just made that one up. Pretty funny I must say!! ) so we limber up the tongue, stretches for the body, vocal exercises for the voice. I didn't feel like so much of a freak when I stood around in a circle of 3 other people sounding out 'ooooooo's and 'ahhhhhhhh's.

After our limbering up, we did a dry run of the scenes - where Samantha goes home with Gino only to find out that he lives with his mother. Dry runs are fun because it is just a reading, with some body, movement improv. Watching and being part of the dynamic was in itself a rush! I was acting (or at least trying to). Charlotte sat at the back of the class, giving us points to follow, things to do with our bodies and listening to our voices. There is alot that goes into being a director, and the difference between film and theater is that in film, there are camera angles to worry about, continuity from scene to scene, but in theater - it's all in how you project, how the viewing audience sees it. Was it strong, did it look/sound awkward? How was the blocking (making sure that people don't walk in front of eachother during a scene)? Lots going on at once, and this was only with 3 people! I wrote a few scenes where there are up to 10 people in one scene! Yikes!

Three hours went by so quickly, it was ridiculous! We ran through 3 scenes (two which were short, but nonetheless complicates) and it was great! Charlotte and the rest of us were surprised with the results! For a first rehearsal, it was great. I attribute it to the instant chemistry we all had as a group. I am sure that having a good script helps, along with a cast who are enthusiastic about acting in a play they all really enjoy. I remember the time (seems like months ago) when Charlotte, Samantha and Carrie (our would be then director) met with the no-energy, egocentric 'my shit don't smell' potential director. Samantha (producer) was beside herself with anxiety and fear: This is so stressing! We're not going to get this off the ground in time! And we need a director and a finished script! Here we are, a month later and things are on track and the energy is amazing. It is quite exciting to see the genesis of a project, especially when it's one that you have written from scratch! Sigh. It's wild and wacky stuff.

So the next rehearsal is Saturday, followed by a part at Charlotte's house. Actors are fun people - animated to a fault, and rarely taking themselves seriously, they know how to mingle. I am looking forward to it, and sick or not, I will be there!

CBT Interview:
I had been told that this interview would last about 2 1/2 hours in total, but it was so strange! I felt like I was being interrogated, but the interrogators were two nice doctors who make the whole process less painful, but still...

I had to fill out this long (and I mean 12 pages long) questionnaire asking me all kind of questions like: "Have you ever felt so angry that you wanted to kill somebody, do you eat more or less now that you are depressed, do you thoughts that are not your own' and on and on. I have had these questions asked of me before, they seem pretty standard for giving an initial diagnosis, or point the doctor in the right direction as to where your head is at. No voices. No compulsion to want to hurt myself or others, just feeling shitty about myself.

Lots of waiting in waiting rooms until I was seen by the 'team' - one Dr. that looked more like a rabbi than a shrink, and the other looked like he would be running his own retired man/home renovation show. I got a good vibe from them, so that put me at ease right away. The thing that creeped me out was that I was sitting in front of a one way mirror. They had told me that they would be taping and watching my session for study purposes (which I thought was cool), but it was hearing the people behind it moving around, shuffling, talking. I tried not to look, but the curiosity was killing me! I felt like I was on 'Law and Order' in the famous interrogation room with the one way glass!
I want an attorney!
This is just a psych evaluation. You're not under arrest.
I plead the fifth! And stop playing that 'bad cop/good cop' routine with me!
Miss, we're not police, we are doctors. We are going to evaluate you to see if you are an ideal candidate for this form of therapy.
Okay - is this Candid Camera? Where is the camera? Hello?!?

That was a funny outrageous scenario I ran through my head. I don't thing that the head shrinkers would have found it as funny as I did though...

So 2 hours later, after cracking open my head and examining my complete history from childhood to yesterday, they took a few minutes to break and discuss - ME! LOL! I sat in the nice plushy waiting area, sinking into and enjoying the oversized couches and room with lots of windows (this wing of the hospital used to be an old mansion on the hill, so many of the rooms are transformed into offices and waiting rooms in the actual rooms!) 5 minutes, 10, 15 passed and the two docs emerged. They brought me back into the room. I felt like I was going through my second interview for an important job! I was nervous because they could have said: "You're beyond home Miss Kitty, so back to the pack of hungry wolves you go!". But they didn't. They said that they had a very interesting conversation about me (???!!??) and thought I would be an ideal candidate for this kind of therapy. I was so relieved. Help! At last. BUT (there is always a but) therapy only starts in JULY!! AHHHH!! But the way I see it, I got in, and that is a step in the right direction. I am going to get help and follow a course of therapy which I think will change my life completely - for the better.

WOW! I feel like I have been run over by a whole fleet of busses! Time to go and have a bowl of chicken soup and flush this bug out of my system!!!!!!!!!